Only by cutting off expectations can one live with true resilience.
Don't rely on anyone. Mountains crumble, people run away; only relying on yourself is the most reliable foundation. Completely cut off expectations of others, don't crave help, don't depend on assistance. Grit your teeth and bear it all yourself. This resilience of relying on no one is the foundation of becoming your own pillar of support.
Waiting for others to rescue you is always the most unreliable form of self-deception. Life won't offer a helping hand just because you're wronged or in trouble. More often than not, the harder you fall, the harder you have to get back up. In this life, you must ultimately learn to face the storms alone. That spirit of believing only in yourself and relying on no one else isn't bravado; it's the most practical lesson life teaches us, and the strongest trump card for navigating the world.
Ride-hailing drivers understand this reality of having no one to rely on best. At two in the morning, the main roads are deserted except for the streetlights. You finally get a long-distance fare, hoping to earn more, but then your car breaks down halfway, or the battery dies and you're stranded on the roadside. On one hand, there's the anxiety of the order countdown on their phone; on the other, there are the impatient messages from passengers. Anyone would be frustrated. But sitting on the roadside in a daze is useless, waiting for someone to come to their aid is even more time-consuming, and if the fare falls through, not only will they lose money, but they'll also have to pay a penalty for breach of contract.
All the drivers can do is act immediately: quickly contact a tow truck, apologize to the passenger with a smile, and even pay out of their own pocket to call a car for the passenger to get away, just to minimize their losses. After all the running around and struggling, the sky is already beginning to lighten, and all the hard work of the night has gone down the drain, without even a word of comfort. But this is adult life; tears are worthless, complaints go unheard, and the strength to solve problems is the most valuable asset.
It's not just ride-hailing drivers; small business owners also experience this feeling of bearing everything alone every day. Running a small shop or business may seem respectable, but it's a constant tightrope walk: upstream suppliers are constantly pressing for payment, calling incessantly even for a day's delay; downstream customers are polite when picking up goods, but make all sorts of excuses to delay payment, sometimes for half a year or more; and then there are rent, utilities, and employee salaries—none of which can be delayed.
The worst fear is a sudden break in the cash flow; that suffocating feeling can drive you to the brink of collapse. Want to borrow money from friends? These days, everyone's struggling financially, and nobody wants to take on that risk for nothing. Want a bank loan? The endless procedures and approvals are so cumbersome it's despairing; by the time the loan is approved, the business is long gone. Those small business owners who manage to survive—weren't they all hard-working survivors? They shamelessly send messages and make countless calls to customers to chase payments, humbly negotiate payment terms with suppliers, and when they can't take it anymore, they sit alone in their cars smoking until dawn, swallowing all their grievances and pressure. But the next day, when you open the door, you still have to greet customers with a smile and grit your teeth to solve all sorts of problems. No one can cover your losses, no one can help you through tough times; to survive, you have to tough it out yourself.
Even interns fresh out of school and struggling in big cities have to learn this "lone wolf" spirit early on. Alone in an unfamiliar city, rent requires a deposit and three months' rent upfront, and a starting salary is barely enough to make ends meet; life is a struggle. Work is even more difficult; a proposal you've worked on for days is publicly humiliated by your boss; even when it's a senior employee's fault, the blame is shifted onto you, leaving you no chance to defend yourself.
If you're hoping for someone to comfort you or help you at this point, you'll never be able to establish yourself in a big city. Smart young people understand that you have to swallow your grievances and bear your difficulties alone. I'd hide under the covers in my rented room at night and cry it all out, letting out all the grievances and sadness. The next morning, I'd get up early, buy a hot coffee, and sit in front of the computer again, revising the plan. Even if I knew nothing, I'd grit my teeth and learn, ask questions. After all, the grievances I suffered will pass, and no one can take away the skills I've earned myself. That self-made confidence is the most reliable.
These people and events in life all teach us a painful yet realistic truth: relying on others is digging your own grave. Always hoping for a better environment, always hoping for a windfall, always thinking someone will lend a hand—in the end, you'll only be caught off guard when unexpected events occur. There are no saviors in this world. True strength isn't about having a smooth journey, but about being able to clean up your own messes and grit your teeth to overcome all difficulties when no one is there to help or support you.
Every storm you weather alone, every moment of perseverance without applause, every stubborn rise after a fall—these will all become your strongest armor, protecting you as you walk more steadily and further. In life, you must ultimately live with your head held high, even if you have no one behind you. You must live as an army, never running away, never retreating, never relying on others.
This strength to fight to the bitter end in adversity, relying on no one, is not innate; it is forged through repeated experiences and trials. Cut off all expectations of others, let go of all wishful thinking and dependence, and forge your own path with your own hands, living with unwavering resilience. When you learn to rely solely on yourself, you will discover that you are stronger than you imagined, and that you yourself are the most reliable support.