The confidence you gain through your own efforts is the most valuable.
Stop naively hoping someone will lend you a hand. The most reliable person in this world is never someone else, but yourself. Mountains may crumble, people may run away; only by becoming strong can you avoid depending on anyone's whims and stand firm when storms come.
This world never plays by the rules, and no one is obligated to treat you kindly. What you consider social connections may be worthless in the face of self-interest; what you perceive as a stable life may change in an instant. No matter how big or nice someone else's roof is, if the rain gets heavy, you'll still get soaked. It's far better to hold your own umbrella firmly, providing a sense of security wherever you go. Reality is that mercenary; it only values those with ability and never sympathizes with the weak who only know how to cry.
Just look at the workplace around you. How many people, after turning 35, live in constant fear at work, afraid of being late, afraid of making mistakes, afraid of being easily replaced by a single dissatisfaction from their boss? With elderly parents to care for and young children to raise, burdened by mortgage and car loan payments, many lack the courage to even quit their jobs. Meanwhile, look at those with genuine skills—professional expertise, rich experience—they remain unfazed even during company layoffs or industry downturns. It's not luck; it's their confidence. They can find work anywhere, headhunters constantly calling—that's the safety net provided by their abilities. Companies only employ those who create value; no one will pay for your future. Your livelihood depends on your skills, which no one can take away.
The truth in relationships is even more brutal. Many people lose themselves in love, revolving their lives around their partner, replying to messages instantly, always available, desperately trying to please them, yet still failing to keep them. Why? Because placing all their security in someone else's arms is like a vine clinging to a tree; when the tree falls, they crumble. Only by becoming a strong tree yourself, with deep roots and a robust trunk, can you withstand wind and rain, and remain unafraid of your partner leaving. Good relationships are never about dependence or begging, but about two people being equals and appreciating each other. Only when you are good enough can you confidently choose to love or not love; this is the highest level of clarity an adult can achieve.
Ultimately, you have to bear life's hardships yourself. Don't always rely on your parents; they've worked hard their whole lives, and one day they will grow old and unable to keep up. Don't always rely on your friends; everyone has their own life to live, and no one can always be your safety net. When you're sick, you're the one who suffers; when you encounter difficulties, you're the one who stays up all night worrying. Instead of wasting time on useless social gatherings, thinking that knowing more people will open more doors, let go of those ineffective social interactions and spend your time and energy on yourself.
Less late nights, more exercise, take care of your health; more learning, more doing, improve your abilities; less complaining, more action, maintain a stable mindset. When you have a healthy body, a stable income, and an independent mind, you don't need to be subservient to anyone, nor do you need to compromise yourself. You can calmly resolve problems and handle difficulties with composure. That inner calmness and confidence is something nothing can buy.
In this life, the only person you can truly rely on is yourself. What others give is temporary; what you earn yourself is for life. Invest in yourself, strengthen yourself. When you are capable and independent enough, life will naturally treat you kindly, and the stability and happiness you desire will gradually come your way.