Treating everyone around you as sparring partners is the ultimate way to live.
Don't dwell on who's good and bad around you, who's helping you and who's sabotaging you. Truly smart people have long since turned everyone around them into sparring partners for their growth. Life is never a solo battle. Those who annoy you, make things difficult for you, and make you feel wronged are there to teach you skills. Accept them, and you'll win.
The most grueling thing in the workplace is that nitpicking boss. The proposal you stayed up all night working on, they glance at it and point out a ton of problems; the project you poured your heart and soul into, they fixate on the smallest flaw; even your daily work, they can find fault with everything, making you want to slam your fist on the table and walk out. Many people, when faced with such a boss, react with resentment and complaints, feeling that the boss is deliberately targeting them, and even starting to doubt themselves, wondering if they really lack ability.
But think about it from another perspective, isn't this the most hardcore form of training? My friend Xiao Zhou encountered such a boss. At first, he complained every day, feeling like going to work was like going to a funeral. Later, he realized, if the boss is nitpicking, then he'll remove those nitpicks one by one. When his plans were criticized, he would refine them repeatedly, meticulously perfecting every detail; when problems were pointed out in his work, he would review and summarize, fixing every loophole. After a year of this, Xiao Zhou's work abilities improved dramatically. His plans could be approved on the first try without revisions, and he handled problems with comprehensive consideration. Later, he jumped to a better company, doubling his salary, and interviewers praised his meticulous work and solid skills. Only then did he realize that his demanding boss wasn't an enemy, but a sparring partner who pushed him to grow rapidly, giving him skills that would be invaluable in any market.
This principle applies not only to the workplace but also to business. A market without competitors is destined to be short-lived. Those competitors who keep you up at night are actually your best motivators. If the fruit shop next door has lower prices and fresher fruit, you can only find better sources, optimize pricing, and improve service; if competitors launch new products and marketing models, you can only force yourself to innovate and keep up, daring not to slack off in the slightest. Without these competitors, you might become complacent with your established business, slowly succumbing to complacency and ultimately being eliminated by the market. Just like the milk tea industry, new brands emerge constantly, forcing established brands to continuously develop new products and upgrade the experience to maintain their foothold. This growth is driven by competition. Competitors are like a mirror, reflecting your shortcomings and pushing you to become a better version of yourself.
Even the moments with family and friends that hurt you hold the key to growth. Everyone has experienced being betrayed by those close to them—perhaps a trusted friend stabbing you in the back, a best friend constantly comparing you, or a former lover turning away. When these things happen, it feels like a wound has been torn open in your heart, the pain is unbearable, and you might even begin to doubt humanity, feeling like you've given your heart and soul to a dog.
But after the tears and pain, you'll slowly understand that people's hearts are hidden, and not everyone deserves your complete trust. You'll learn to set boundaries and stop blindly trusting others. You'll realize that relying on yourself is worse than relying on others, and you'll stop placing your hopes on others. Like someone who was swindled out of her savings by her best friend, after crying, she didn't give up but started working hard again, learning to discern people's true intentions and developing a strong inner strength. Later, when she encountered all sorts of people, she was no longer easily fooled and could calmly handle various interpersonal relationships. Those betrayals and disappointments, though painful, shed her naivety and made her mature and insightful—a rare kind of growth.
Even the strangers you pass by in life, those trivial and unpleasant things, are all there to test you. Encountering an unreasonable person on the bus who insists on taking your seat and throws a tantrum, if you immediately lose your temper, you'll only get incredibly angry. It's better to stay calm and not argue with such a person. This tempers your character, teaching you to remain composed and patient in the face of adversity. At work, encountering a partner who shirks responsibility and blames everything on you when problems arise, if you only focus on arguing, you'll only delay things. It's better to calmly handle the situation, clarify the details, and gather evidence. This teaches you to see through people's true nature, how to deal with unreliable individuals, and how to protect your own interests.
These seemingly unpleasant people and situations are like tests life presents. Each question is difficult, and each pass is hard-won, but as long as you overcome them, you'll reap the corresponding growth. A nitpicking boss hones your professional skills; a difficult opponent forces your innovation; someone who betrays you teaches you how to judge character; an unreasonable stranger hones your emotional management skills.
Life is never a smooth road; you'll always encounter various difficulties and setbacks, and all sorts of people who make you uncomfortable. But don't treat these people and things as your enemies. Instead of complaining, getting caught up in your own anxieties, and wasting your time, treat them as sparring partners for growth. Treat others' difficulties as opportunities to improve yourself; treat the setbacks as stepping stones to hone your skills; treat those unpleasant people and situations as fuel for your growth.
Swallow all the grievances, digest all the malice, and let these experiences become part of your very being, your armor to overcome all obstacles. When you've honed your skills and developed a strong heart, able to calmly face life's challenges and accept the people around you, you'll find that those people and things that once gave you headaches have become your most precious assets on your life's journey.
Treat everyone around you as sparring partners, avoid getting caught up in your own anxieties and wasting your time, focus on improving yourself—this is the highest level of living. After all, in the end, life isn't about who has better luck, but about who has stronger abilities and a more stable mind. When you are strong enough, all the storms will become nutrients for your growth; all the passersby will become stepping stones to your success.