Long Ago ...Owning My Ghost

"I just want us to be what we are―natural and free."

Her jaw dropped in surprise. "I don't believe you actually said that―it's a phrase you always said, even back then―natural and free."

When she repeated the two words something happened inside me.

"You just reminded me of this song I kept listening to when I was a teenager. Every time they got to this one part, I started to weep and never knew why. The lyrics were:

You are my love and my life
You are my inspiration,
Just you and me
Simple and free

"The words aren't exact, but they must remind me of something way back in my psyche..."

I stopped in mid-thought. "Oh, my God", I rasped, "I know who you were―I remember."

"What was my name?" she asked.

"Amber...Amber Lennox."

Her eyes were bright with surprise. "So, you do remember. Do you want to know what your name was?"

"No, please..." I croaked, grasping her hand tightly in mine. "I'm sorry, Love, I'm just not ready. Some day maybe―but not here―not now."

She leaned over and kissed me. "It's okay, really. I understand. She hesitated and then whispered, "I love you, Prof."

Her voice was a soft purr and her perfume faint and powdery, as it always was... even back then.

It took me a second before I realized what she said and as I gazed into her eyes, recognized I felt even that too, right from the start.

I knew then why I wasn’t frightened by the supernatural—why ghosts don’t terrify me.

I had been haunted by a ghost all my life and didn’t even know it.