The CV of an Average Giveaway Dog

I have a neighbour who loves dogs. Every kind. He likes cats too, but somehow they have never got along, when he tries to pet cats they try to bite his hand off. What’s important, he loves dogs and dogs really love him.

He has a small family house with a large garden. His family is small, so therefore they could use one more member to play, have fun with and chit-chat. One of their expectations from the dog is for it to bark and alarm the family when someone uninvited wants to enter their property. Technically, they need a dog they can rely on. They don’t want a tiny stylish puppy, neither they want a pitbull that could harm some of his family members. They just want a normal sized dog with normal dog habits.

A lot of people have dogs, but for some reason can’t take care of them anymore and decide to give them away. My neighbour prefers adopting instead of buying a dog. But, it seems that things have changed a bit since the last time he had a dog.

I helped him while he was searching for the right dog on the internet. Here are some of the CVs of the dogs people give away that my neighbour and I have found:

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1. People usually brag about their dog being very sweet and charming. But that’s not what he wants. They need one with an initiative, to bark and protect its territory. So we have to write these ones off.


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2. The next advertisement seemed very promising untill we read the dogs name. Leonora. They are artistic family, but they really don’t need a dog with such an artistic name. He fears he would be constantly laughed at and mocked. Writing this ad off too.

3. German shepherd. A true gentlemens dog. But there is one problem, at the end of the ad there is a warning that the dog needs a year to relax and get used to the new owners. They are really not that patient. They need it to relax as soon as it arrives. Another one written off.



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4. A true pedigree dog. Well fed and well very well bred. The dog starts to bark only when his owner tells him so. Wait. Only when the owner tells him to? That’s not what they need. They need an independent dog that makes his own decisions when to bark and when not to. Another one bites the dust.



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5. The mother of this dog is clean well-bred dog. However the father is identified as an anonymous. Anonymous dog? Something here doesn’t sound right. Let’s move on to the next one.



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6. After a few lines of complimenting the dog, comes the next sentence: He likes to argue. What? My neighbour already has enough arguments with his wife, he doesn't want one more member to argue with. What does that even mean, you give him a command and he files a complaint? Next.



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7. The thing that bothered my neighbour in this advertisement was the following request - before getting this dog, you should get another one, a much larger one. So the new dog feels safe. Ok…



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8. A hunter dog with traumas. He is scared when he hears a shot fired. Not allowed to be taken hunting. My neighbours aren't hunters, but this is odd, we are moving to the next advertisement



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9. In this advertisement it is noticed that the dog is very attached to its owners. My neighbour is really sorry, but he can only afford to take the dog, they do not need the owners as well. Let’s go to number ten.

10. A nice-looking black dog with thicker fur. But warning. You have to cut his eyebrows every two weeks. Why? When his eyebrows are long he gets nervous. They really don’t need a dog that needs a stylist more often then they do. Let’s take a look at the last one…



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11. Everything sounds great at the beginning. But as always there is a catch. The dog will run away if we leave the gate open. Nope, doesn’t suit their needs. They need one that knows his territory.

We alredy knew that bad parenting affects the childs personality. But now we are aware that this also applies for dogs. The search for the right dog continues…