(Funny Relationship Experience Challenge)
Hey, people! Today's is an entry to another challenge. This time I was nominated by our @ruth-girl for this as seen here :
https://steemit.com/funnyexperience/@ruth-girl/mr-jinx-funny-relationship-experience-challenge
Well much like @ruth-girl my funny story also takes place by the sea side. Not the beautiful resort town she paints a picture of though. Mine takes place on the nasty brown waters of the gulf of Mexico down on Galveston beach. A group of us go down there together kinda like a couples night out. It was about an hours drive from our place in sweaty Houston. I wouldn't call her my girlfriend we were more of a friends with benefits scenario. We both knew it. We swim all day and get pretty liquored up, all the guys start a bond fire on the beach because that is what a bunch of guys do. We love lighting shit on fire. It goes back to the dawn of man and our love of fire. So we are all sitting around drinking our Natty light beer (which is the most ECO friendly beer because it is made of 99.9% filter domestic cat piss) and feeling invincible. About an hour or two of this and someone guides their hand straight down my pants. WOOOO hello! So we sneak off and I am crazy excited, I mean they actually named a drink after this...... Sex on the beach......... so it has to be good right?
WRONG
The joke "someone has sand in her vagina" from Southpark. Yeah that is a real thing. At first you get in there and everything seems good. A couple strokes later and you are in for a bad fucking surprise my friend. Imagine someone giving you an Indian sunburn on your willy. Not fucking cool. It wasn't any better on her end either. Not sure of how to explain her experience but it seemed equally as awful. And that is why to this day I have never been able to drink a sex on the beach mixed drink. It just brings up to many bad memories.
Use the #funnyexperience tag
Nomination time:
@profanereviews
@beeyou lol
@mysearchisover
@amariespeaks
@johndoer123
@cryptkeeper17
@dj123
edit @pangoli is an alternate since half of these turds will not participate or prude out.
I have to ask for 7 other people to take part in this (if they wish too, of course):
You know I’m one of those turds that will prude out. 😝 Don’t ruin sex on the beach for me. I love that drink!
Silent vow to not upvote a single content hereon out until I’m at 100%. How the heck did I drop down to 70 when I’m away most of the time.
yeah right. You can't deny the upvotes. If you are at 70% you have an entire day and a half till 100%. good luck. I am at 71% myself
So 1 hour passed and you are right. I made another upvote. Only way to not upvote is to stay out of here completely. So many will miss my charming self though. ;)
Ouch! Ouch! Ouch! Ouch! Oooouch!
I have used sand to peel off dead skin cells but never from the inside :P
Hahahahahaha!
Hilarious, but don't worry. lol. we ain't talking about it.
Shit. I should have nominated you. I am extending the list. you are now on it. I am going back to edit it
oh dear. lol
You can have my spot.
Lol. There ain't no way y'all backing out on this one. lol.
You're in! ;-p