That's yet another interesting perspective. Specially this one:
that a stable caregiver is usually the most important and significant help for a traumatized person.
I think, I agree
Some people and many self-help books use the word trauma in its broadest sense to mean any unpleasant experience, even if the person affected is responding to the experience in a psychologically healthy way.
I want to make the concept of trauma a bit easier to understand, at least for myself.
Trauma can be any distressing experience that exceeds a person's ability to cope—whether physical or emotional. It's important to remember that everyone’s threshold is different. For example, what seems like a typical childbirth for one person might be traumatic for another. Of course, there may be other factors involved, like the relationship with the child’s father, but even just the physical pain and challenges can make the experience traumatic for someone. And that’s not even counting the impact of hormonal imbalances that can add to the distress.
The definition of trauma is complex and varies for everyone. But when I was thinking about this project, two main ideas came to mind. First, trauma can be when someone violates your personal boundaries—physically, emotionally, or sexually. Second, it can come from situations completely outside your control, like the death of a loved one, where a person feels unable to move on and might need help to heal.
Bambuka's exercises may work for some cases, but not for others. Replicating each trauma is not only really possible, but could be even more damaging—especially when it comes to sexual abuse, particularly by a family member who was supposed to be a protector. Still, I want to explore this idea and see where it leads.
I did not mean to stop you.
I disagree. Because the purpose of a definition is the exact opposite. If trauma really varies for everyone, than there is no definition possible at all. If traum is complex, than there is no simple definition possible.
We must not be fixed neither to a definition nor to a word. If someone asks for help, is that the fact and not our defintions and not our amateur (non-expertise) diagnostic skills.
Only for yourself. It is neither our task nor our experience nor our expertise to make a concept "a bit easier".
That is the essential theme. We do not need to call it 'trauma'. We only have to listen to a person who says: 'This exceeds my ability to cope with". That's the point to start the conversation, the communication, the listening or reading.
And last not least: "I am an anchor" is just the answer to the question on what is your role. NOT the answer to: "Who am I?" This fundamental question is to be answered on another level. No one will reach this level neither by simplifying definitions nor by wanting to help others nor by being the anchorperson to join helpers with patients.
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