[Kongregate PR Guessing Game]

in CEO Champion's Gate4 years ago (edited)

I have just sent the following email to Kongregate:


Hey guys, TheGrandestine here,

I have been thinking of using blocks to promote undefeated spider, and (obviously) Chess Evolved Online, but there is a problem:

I have 1340 blocks, less than many of my players.

As far as I can tell, the amount of blocks is completely finite, so after they are used, (and after other developers do the same), this feature essentially no longer exists. I think blocks are a great opportunity for you to incentivize certain useful behaviors, so I have a few ideas:

option A: create a few API tools for developers to call in their games that allow players to spend their blocks inside the games they like for whatever the developer happens to sell them. Having a block shop inside CEO for example, would mean players have tangible uses for blocks, and also means developers can gain more exposure by having engaged players.

option B: give developers blocks every time someone makes a Kreds purchase in their game. This would mean that games generating revenue for Kongregate automagically promote themselves in ratio to the amount of people paying combined onto activity of the developers, and would also allow players to have a secondary incentive for spending in the first place. If they love the game, and spending money has a direct impact on the number of new players, then it would entice them into spending a little more often knowing they are having a direct impact on the game itself and not just the developer/Kongregate.

option C: simply sell blocks to developers as a better-than-nothing bandaid. Seriously. It's better than nothing.

option D: give developers a "blocks revenue" based on their game's scores and/or past popularity. generate bonuses for being #1 in certain categories such as the #1 CCG of all time Chess Evolved Online. Since CCG is the master-race of all gaming categories, bar none, this should yield a 100x bonus compared to other lesser categories like 'Card'.

option E: allow players to 'donate' blocks to developers they endorse. This should be a no-brainer and needs no explanation, to such an extreme that even the act of explaining it should be considered insulting to one's intelligence. How is this not an option already?

option F: do nothing, fail, and pretend solving this was somehow impossible. Yes, this is technically an option, but it's not a very good one.

option G: gimmy more blocks to promote CEO. I'll stop complaining for a while, and the objectively-best game on your site which is also essentially exclusive to your site (for now) will be shoved into people's faces so they can recall that Kongregate was once a place of pride and glory.

I prefer A+B or maybe C+D, or even several of these combined,
but since people never listen to me,
and reasonable things probably won't happen,
I will settle for G, as a bounty for my brilliant earth-shattering suggestions.

please donate the mandated 2.147 billion blocks to 'TheGrandestine' instead of my decoy account, thanks.

-Jo




Prizes will be given to the people that guess
closest to their actual response.

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RE: Blocks system and how it could be improved

Hello TetGrandestine! We have taken your feedback into consideration and have passed it along.

Our current plans for the Blocks system are currently limited to stickers for now. If you want to obtain more Blocks as a user or developer, play some of the highlighted games using the Badge of the Day system, which now gives extra Blocks as a bonus!

Have a good day!

Reply to user-alphacore@steemit.com at 3:40 AM. This is NOT a customer support email. If you need support as a customer, contact support@kongregate.com. If you are an investor or entrepreneur, please urgently contact acquisition@kongregate.com.


-main_gi

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 4 years ago Reveal Comment

Hello TheGrandestscheme,

Once we got to replying to this email after two weeks, we discovered that our team of magical game experience engineers was too busy to complete any of the above suggestions. The list was great though, and we hope that you continue to offer suggestions in the future!

After removing chat we found that games with fewer than 1000 concurrent players haven't been affected at all in average user engagement, because according to our statistics all of these numbers are within the margin of error. Considering the amount of cost we were able to cut in the process, this makes it a net win for the community. Now we can engage in other more important ventures with our server space, like selling it to bitcoin miners as timeshares to use the machine we bought in the first place and now have no server load to put on.

What was the request about again? Oh yeah, blocks. Well it's best to just forget those exist, we've decided to instead remove all the uses for them besides buying stickers so the players who bought those and now can't use them in the chatrooms they had before don't feel so bad.

Thank you for using Kongregate,
-CSR [Redacted]

 4 years ago Reveal Comment

Hello, [username]. Thank you for contacting us with your insightful and interesting [contact method].

Someone will read your [contact method] eventually, and may even respond once they are fired and their NDA has lapsed, so worry not!

 4 years ago Reveal Comment
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Hi TheGrandestine, this will be my last email on behalf of Kongregate, as I have just been informed that I have been fired by way of not being payed. I would recommend for you to realize that this site is going to shit under MTG's leadership, and try moving to another portal. Blocks are probably going to end up just as meaningless as chat stickers, because they have no clue how to f**king communicate and closed the chats right after that release without warning.

  • Disgruntled Employee
 4 years ago Reveal Comment

What's the deadline for their response for the purposes of this contest? I'm predicting radio silence for two weeks.

When I tried to inform them a couple years ago of a data breach of user login details, it took that long to be told that they'd look into it.

 4 years ago Reveal Comment

I'd hope for B or C, but realistically E or F will happen

 4 years ago Reveal Comment

So... what was the response

-"no response"

oh...
[REDACTED]

 4 years ago 

This post has received a 33.97 % upvote from @boomerang.

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