Why People Give Up on Love
Love is among the most beautiful aspects in life, but it is also one of the most hurtful. A lot of individuals begin to love with hope, excitement, and great dreams and halfway through, some of them end up giving up.
The concept of love starts getting wearisome, bewildered or even useless to them. This is not always a case since love is not bad but due to experiences, expectations, and being human, love is not always a light burden to bear.
Repeated heartbreak has been one of the greatest reasons why people give up on love. When a person puts his heart and soul in a relationship and the relationship breaks, the hurt may cause very serious scars. Having been hurt once, a person may not lose hope. However, when the injury occurs repeatedly, there starts developing fear.
Human beings begin to defend themselves by developing emotional walls. I have known that heartbreak transforms one who is loving and open into one who is distant and cold. As time passes, it is safer not to risk love as it would be to go through a hurtful experience again.
Betrayal is another factor that makes people give up in love. Love is based on trust and once broken all other things tremble.
Deception, deceit and betrayal will ruin the perception that love exists. It is difficult to trust others when one has been betrayed by the one he/she considered the most. A lot of people say to themselves that it is not worth loving again because you can build trust so easily and destroy it with a penknife.
The unrealistic expectations are also significant.
The concept of love is romanticized in movies, social media, and narratives to make it look ideal and hassle-free. The people want love to be exciting and romantic at all times. They are disappointed when real life love is accompanied by conflicts, exhaustion and misunderstanding.
Others end up giving up since love does not appear as they had imagined. I used to assume that love must always be magic yet life made me realize that true love needed time, hard work and forgiveness.
Another good reason why people give up on love is fear. People can be afraid to be hurt, they can be afraid of being rejected and being vulnerable, preventing them to do it again. To love someone is to give a chance to open the heart and give a person an opportunity to see your weak points. This seems to be too risky to many people. They prefer solitude to the chances of suffering. Although love is happy, the fear of loss tends to prevail.
Having had past trauma also drives out love. Experiences in childhood, divorced families or abusive relationships may influence the perception of love in a person. When a person grew up witnessing the failure of love, he/she may think that love could not last long.
The beliefs remain in the head and influence subsequent relationships. I have observed that when people have experienced too much pain, they tend to quit not because they want to, but they do not know how to love without fear.
The other cause is emotional exhaustion. Loving, forgiving, explaining and trying may also be exhausting especially when this is one sided. It is possible that when a person cannot feel appreciated or even unheard of, he/she can lose the power to continue. Love starts weighing down on her rather than being a blessing. By this time, surrendering is like taking a break.
Lastly, other individuals abandon love due to the misunderstanding of peace and loneliness. It is relaxing to be alone after a chaotic day and a stressful emotional day. They take pleasure in the silence and freedom and they persuade themselves that they do not need love anymore. Although peace is a value, human beings are made to be connected. Breaking up with love can offer short-term relief, nevertheless, the urge to love persists in most cases.
To sum up, love is abandoned by people due to numerous reasons: heartbreak, betrayal, fear, unrealistic expectations, past trauma, and emotional exhaustion. Love is not just easy, but it does not necessarily become fair. Nevertheless, despite the fact people surrender it does not imply that the love is dead. At other times it is just that they are exhausted, resting, or studying. Love is painful, but it teaches and shapes and tells us that it is human to feel deeply.