Tell your story#74 - The Little Flower That Wasn't Allowed to Bloom

_{A metaphorical representation of Edima Unsplash}

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Many girls now go to school. Women are given a chance to equally compete in our workspaces. Healthy competition is promoted in the media and various quarters, particularly here on Steemit. However, in the dark corners, many ladies are still nipped in the bud, even before they get a chance to bloom.

Today, I'd tell you the story of a little flower who worked so hard to bloom only for her buds to get nipped by the very person who should guide and protect her. This is one issue I dislike discussing in public spaces, but since we still have people who exhibit this primitive behaviour, I'd share it with my sisters so we learn and help solve similar issues around us.

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Edima's Story

Edima was the highest CGPA holder in her class. In fact, she was the first student to ever hit 5.0 GPA consistently since the inception of her department in 1989. We called her the "brain box" and everyone knew that she'd be graduating with a First-class at the end of the duration of her course.

For context, there had never been any first-class graduate in that department before that time. Also, she'd be the first female and first student to ever achieve such honour. But this dream was short-lived.

_{Would the young flower bloom if we pinched it? Unsplash}
In her 400 level, during the second semester, she received a low grade in one of her tests. Affected students who scored 0-5 were asked to meet the lecturer in less than 48 hours with their notes to prove that they pay attention in class. Edima went to the lecturer's office. She carried her notes, and in her bag were the study materials she used to prepare for that particular course. When it got to her turn, the lecturer asked her to wait behind. Giving some flimsy excuse about why she shouldn't be using other materials beside what was given in class. Even though these materials were quite more comprehensive and simplified than the AI-generated notes the lecturer provided.

Long story cut short, the lecturer tried to make advances at her. We are talking about a 19-year-old girl here. When she refused, she saw an F on the portal at the end of the semester. She tried investigating the cause of the issue but it turned out that the exam officer, HOD and Dean were all friends of this lecturer. So she had to carryover the course. That's an extra year.

The girl who was the model student spent her remaining semesters watching how her superiors washed her struggles down the drain just to frustrate her. Did she finally graduate with a first-class? That's a story for another day.

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In our corners we have many Edimas:

→ Ladies who arrive early, stay late, deliver results consistently, but when it's time to get promoted, it's given to someone who recently joined the team and hasn't delivered half as much.
→ Ladies who considered unfit to lead, even when they have Trump's confidence and Tinubu's smartness.
→ Ladies who are visibly frustrated and pulled down just so they can't attain their goals.

Then they are told, "Oh, the lecturer wouldn't have weaponized your grades if you weren't so beautiful." "Oh, you would have been the Dean today if you weren't so outspoken" "Oh, you are too intelligent and confident, you should shrink yourself a little so they don't come for you."

• I watched a lecturer do this just to send a message to other brilliant students. And I resolved never to watch in silence when another girl or guy is victimised. Today it's her, tomorrow it's you.
• I've also learnt never to shrink myself just to get accepted. My confidence, my intelligence and beauty is never an excuse or weapon to be used to victimise me.
• I'm still trying to identify how to create a system where affected students can seek redress and have their issues solved promptly. I need more suggestions on how to go about this. Every idea is welcome.

Oh, little flower...

_{Bloom...bloom...bloom!}

To the little flowers around (female or male), find a way to bloom. If anyone tries to nip you in the bud, ensure you sting them so hard. I noticed when these realities happen to us, we feel so weak or overwhelmed to fight, especially against authorities who seem to wield more power than us. Reason why we should extend our hands to help victims of this menace. You could be the backbones they need.

If only we had listening leaders who are willing and ready to help their subjects. We can collectively put a stop to harassments and oppressions if we try.

PS: It's embarrassing that we still have to talk or write about these issues even in this time and age. I'm one click from deleting everything because I'm still baffled that what I witnessed was real. Or could I have been dreaming? Someone wake me!