it's more a rhyme than a poem and to me, it's distracting from the essence of the text therefore it makes it a hard-to-understand text. I keep wondering what it's about..
long belong late weight rise eyes slight light thin within play bay sun won dread led .... is this the message?
if so that wood be cool
Happy writing and a great weekend
Thank you for pointing this out. I will try to write better and make it simpler and more understandable in the future :)