what could have been?

I used to chase, not love. Meaning lost as the living, caring sustains it, and respect coexists.

Would I be able to live without it, the obvious case of hollowing out.
Being a kid, oblivious to what resides around, the world we believe in. Dreams and the certainty that all is attainable. Standing in front of a class of peers, a vote to be cast, for something, a competition, or to be chosen as class leader, I'm not sure. What I am sure of is the one vote cast for me. A girl I never spoke to. Why her? Why was she the only one?

Is there pity?

Coincidences that sparked fondness towards her. She was special, sitting in the first seat. Whenever I looked back, she was there. A fondness, just because she was the only one who made me feel seen.

I wanted to.....for once.
Time moves and we are at its mercy.

Photo by Khanh Do on Unsplash

Coffee in hand, I saw her coming down the same path I walk. The cold, the head hooded, the warm cup doing its thing. Usually there is a change in course when someone I know is walking the same way.

This time I decided to keep walking. She was ahead. I knew she was coming, but I wanted to look at her and I did. And she at me.

The eyes I remembered not there, yet the same innocence, the same soft gaze.
At that moment I realized it was never her. It was the memory that made her special to me. The fondness I feel to this day, quite normal.
I never talked to her. Never knew what she was like. I saw what I needed to and assembled the rest.

There was something in common and we never dared to act on it. Knowing nothing and having something. A desire toward something that could have been.

Prompt: Fond of
Entry for the contest Daily Prompts for FreeWriterst

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