RE: Structures of Nothing
What I also dislike are those people who immediately think they have to come up with all kinds of tips on how to make you feel better. Tips that never work. People don't all say the same thing, and processing something takes time. The soul or the spirit, whatever you want to call it, has no concept of time; that's something else that people impose.
Most of the time, we just need a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on. Some people feel they have to say something, as if we should just dump our sadness and cheer up instantly, which is always easier said than done.
I remember when a close friend was going through a hard time; we all just went to his house to be with him. We didn't say, 'I know you're sad, cheer up!'
We just held the space. We did whatever he wanted to do, like playing games or just hanging out.
I think it's enough to know that someone is there, and sooner or later, the truth will come out. Often, it's true that you want to be heard, and then distraction plays a big role. Just sitting in a corner crying or lying in bed doesn't usually make the situation any better, and lying in bed only works if you are actually able to sleep and somehow process what's going on.
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People need time to process things