Wanderwithtwo is a worry bee 🐝

in OCD4 years ago

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Tick tock, tick tock! It seems like it’s becoming the norm for me recently to have these sleeping problems. I know exactly why too.

I’m not going to talk about the world but just talk about what’s happened in Sydney recently. You’ve probably heard of our bushfires, floods and now and growing confirmed cases of the Coronavirus. As much as each disaster took place each month, one after another, my health has faced similar situations.

I started the new year with a terrible cold accompanied by coughs that lasted until February. Once I thought I recovered, I had an infection which required a late night visit to the hospital for medical attention. Nothing serious and I recovered pretty quickly. March has come and I’ve began these coughs with no other symptoms and quickly seemed attention from my local GP. With the whole Coronavirus happening and growing numbers in Sydney, I was worried as hell that I may have caught it somewhere.

A huge sigh of relief that I was told I had a mix of respiratory problems on top of my exisiting allergies that was a result of the recent heavily polluted air and pollen in the air. It was a build up of everything which just smacked me in one go. I was given medication to provide relief. I’m pretty sure it’s been longer than a week and I don’t feel like things have improved and with the media reports on Coronavirus in Australia, I grew even more anxious. I may just be impatient with the recovery time.

On top of the health issues, I’ve also got the stress of having to get on a plane to Brisbane which is literally in just a couple of hours. It is a trip that I can’t cancel as it’s for something pretty important. The news just reported yesterday that someone flew from Sydney to Tasmania and was a confirmed case of the virus! Ugh! I did pack some hand sanitisers, masks and antibacterial wipes for the flight but that just isn’t enough reassurance for some reason.

Not only that but I keep worrying that I have been misdiagnosed and that I actually do have the virus 😭 then that means my whole family is at risk too as I’ve been in contact with them! I know for sure it wouldn’t be the case but I just can’t help myself. Waaaayyy to go media and google for planting all this into my head.

In addition, as I am still coughing, I’m worried I won’t even make it out Brisbane airport. What if they have health officials there who will detain me and suspect that I’ve got the virus? Ahhhhh... it most likely won’t happen but I’m pretty good at imaging a twist of scenarios which doesn’t make it easy. I haven’t been out in the public much recently as I’ve been working from home. I’m also worried of potential judgement from people if they see me coughing. 🤷‍♀️

Sigh, it’s been so many nights with these negative thoughts. I began packing the whole kitchen for our move next week and did some cleaning today. I hoped that it would make me tired so that I can get some good rest. Nope. Here I am. Maybe I ate the wrong foods today that packed on this energy in me that’s keeping me awake 🤔. New thought.

Somebody slap these thoughts out of me so that I can have some peaceful sleep for once. Please. Let’s also pray and hope for a positive April 🙏.

P.S. I am aware of the recent drama happening on Steemit and idgaf. I just can’t. It’s been a long while since I’ve been on Steemit and there’s always been some form of drama, rumour and gossip. I don’t even understand the whole politics and technical side to it and have no plans or interest to understand any of it. Excuse my ignorance there. I’ve been blogging since I was a teenager and carried my blogging to Steemit out of interest to join a community of bloggers who I thought shared the same hobby but I was slightly wrong as I realised a wave of people came for the money. I admit we got sidetracked from our purpose at one stage but when we realised we were no different, we felt disgusted and just wanted out. We were gone for some time. After regathering our thoughts and purpose, we made a return to blog. Blogging was a way to express and share my (or ours, as it is shared between my other half and myself) thoughts and preferences every now and then and I (or we) will continue to do the same in future. As always, Steem on!

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