And what if we listen well? - Human Relations
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Although many people have a very well developed sense of hearing, not all know how to listen.
Not everyone can speak when and where they want, so when someone finds another person who listens to them, they thank them and give them their trust. That is part of Human Relations.
It is so important to listen, and to do it well, that almost all of us are paid more than half of our salary to listen. Listen at work. To the boss, to colleagues, to visitors, by phone ...
Listen at school, on the street, in the warehouse, to the authorities, to the neighbor, to the buyer, to the seller. It is extremely important to listen.
We could consider a small method to listen better, so as not to waste time and get the most out of every conversation, everything we hear, and above all "everything they tell us."
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There are four pillars:
1 - Listen with Empathy. We must try to understand what they tell us, in the way that the person who is telling us understands it.
2- Listen Recapitulating and Anticipating. Simultaneously we must do two things: remember what he told us before and why the dialogue began and at the same time try to anticipate (in our mind) what he will tell us next. If he already said "One" and now he has just said "Two" It is very likely that he will say "Three ".
3 - Listen to "Between Words". Not everyone speaks fluently, there are people who with a few words want to say a lot. In this case, you have to pay special attention and look at their faces, see their expressions, appreciate their intonation. "Between words" can be hidden other ones that we do not hear, but that may contain much of the message.
4 - Listen to the End. It is obvious, so it will not open mistakes or misinterpretations. Depending on the way people express themselves, their oratory, the main message could be expressed in the last sentences of the speech. Thus, if you do not listen to us until the end, it is possible that we take a biased or erroneous idea of what our interlocutor wanted to convey to us.
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By following these simple steps, we can obtain a broader and more precise vision of the psychological profile of the person with whom we are talking, who he is, what he wants, what his intentions are. And so we could "vibrate" at the same frequency making the transmission of ideas optimal.
@juanmolina
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Hi @juanmolina, there is no doubt that learning to listen is a skill that few of us are able to develop beyond having a developed sense of hearing.
This skill involves components such as paying attention, intervene at the right time, generate confidence to the issuer, among other aspects that we expose through our gestures when listening. I believe that in this life we must be attentive to listen and slow to speak as expressed in the Bible. Thank you for your contribution
Well said @madridbg. Not everybody have good listening skills, as someone people. may ask you to repeat yourself as they were absent minded or some might be tapping their feet, which a body language that they are tired of what you are saying and want to leave the place as soon as possible. Being able to truly listen is a very good skill.
Listening is more important than speaking and when we listen then we learn and carefully listening habits also let us understand better.
absolutely and this also make other people understand how much attention we are paying to him. Such a nice read my friend.
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Good evening. Very good tips for productive listening. I especially like the one about listening to the end. Sometimes we tend to get distracted, especially if the other person goes on too long, you have to keep your attention. Something I would like to add, that I read some time ago and it struck me: do not interrupt, the author that today I do not remember his name said that the person who interrupts, and goes ahead with his argument, keeps a certain arrogance because the cognitive scheme that may be behind that behavior is to think that "what I am going to say is more important than what you are communicating". Thanks for sharing, I enjoyed your article. Regards.
Hello, @ellieth.
I loved your comment, thank you very much.
That point that you highlight is the one that I like the most too.
Being interrupted while we speak is one of the most unpleasant situations that we can experience when we speak.
It is in very bad taste and shows very low values of companionship and civility.
The very reason for an effective communication is that the delivered message is received and understood at the very moment it's needed.
Sometimes, excessive information leads to a mislead on what the speaker wants to transmit, so one must be careful on what is said, and even on how it is said.
Excellent post. Regards.
Listening is vital to relate effectively with other people. If we don't listen, how do we respond? The suggestions you provide are of great value and I agree with almost everything you have written. And I say "almost" because in the second tip, anticipating is good to apply with very conscious doses. Why do I say that? Because there are people who do not hear or listen because they are aware of what the other person is supposed to say and what he/she will answer when the other person finishes. Anticipate in listening, yes; anticipate in our response, mmmm, definitely not.
Thank you for such an excellent post.
Hi @juanmolina the truth is I don't know if I am a good listener, your words make me rethink some of my ways of listening to others. thank you
Many people don't understand the skill of listening. Listening involves paying attention to every words and also using your body language to show you are listening, like nodding of your heads. Listening skill is a very good skill.
A very good educative and informative article @juanmolina