The Marriage Custom of The People of Bekwarra

Hello friend
Today I highly welcome you to my. In this post I have shared a brief description of how traditional marriage is been done in my village which is known as Bekwarra. I know this may sound funny to you..

During the precolonial period the pattern of marriage in Bekwarra was considered firstly to be a union between a matured man and woman that must be negotiated by both parents of the matured man and woman.

However, today due to civilization and globalization, in Bekwarra a man and a woman are the once to engaged in all marriage customs of whatever it's agree of them.

Today in Cross River State, Bekwarra is the only place in the state where marriage is now simple and cheaper compared to how it was during precolonial period.

In Bekwarra marriage Palm wine, is one of the items that is very important to the people of Bekwarra, which must be presented by an intending in-law that want to get a wife. The palm wine is usually presented on three different occasions of the visits which is usually; during **negotiations, paying of bride price and the day of marriage. So in a nutshell, for any marriage to hold in Bekwarra, the man has to present at least 150 litres of palm wine as his first gift. However, that is not all. The man has to also present other items like cola nut, crate of minerals, bag of Salt etc.

The people of Bekwarra have had a very sacred beliefs about virginity as of one of the criteria for every unmarried girl. As an umarried girl in Bekwarra you are expected to remain virgin until you have done your marriage.

Bekwarra people belief that virginity is a thing of a pride to the family of the girl which means that the parents of the girl took good care of their daughters and kept them away from chaste. However, as I have earlier said in the precolonial period marriage was negotiated by the parents of the intending couple however, civilization and globalization has altered some changes in Bekwarra marriage.

Although, there are now some traditional customary practices in Bekwarra marriage that have remained unchanged even as civilization and globalization has taken place. In Bekwarra before marriage is arranged, full investigation must be taken as to know the background of the prospective in-laws to either know if the groom or the 👰 bride share blood relations or they're descended from ufia (slave).

The reason for this is to ensure that they marriage didn't get cancel in the long run. There have been some cases where at the end of the day the family would cancel all marriage plans upon the discovering of certain strange family linage.

At the end of courtship between the intending couples, if no family linage was discovered, the family will fixes the date for Introduction. At the day of Introduction, a small ceremony is usually organized by the 👰 bride's family on the eve (I.e a day before) of the Introduction where prayers and advice are offered to both parties for a successful marriage ahead. The bride is presented with domestic gifts like clothes, pots, spoons, plates, shoes, a mortar, palm foodstuffs, oil and many several others

Dowry is very important in the Bekwarra marriage. For any man that wants to have a very successful and happily marriage till death separate him and his wife, has to pay bride price. If a man who doesn't pay bride price got married and his wife die, she will be burried in her father house instead of her husband house, but if her husband has already pay her dowry she will be burried in her husband house.

In Bekwarra, traditional marriage ceremony is held in the bride compound where the groom will present all the items such 150 litres of plan wine, salt, palm oil, kola but, wrappers, a chicken, goat, yams money for the youths in the bride compound and also the leg of an antelope. Bekwarra marriage rites is usually concluded with a simple ritual of the pouring of some small quantity of palm wine on the ground together with a certain prayers which is done by an elderly person.

After the pouring of palm wine and prayers, the bride would then be required to identify her husband. After the ceremony, the bride will then be required to go an change her attire so she can follow her husband home. At this point, there is usually a bit of drama by the bride friends that usually come to complains of one or two thing like "the car that was bringing her broke down on they way coming" or "on their way coming they were attacked".

Well the essence of the drama, is just to add some humor, fun and make the occasion more color. At the end of the day, the bride is excorted at night by some elderly women in her compound and two of her close friends.

Okay friend, what you have just read is a brief of how marriage is been done in my village known as Bekwarra.

Thank you for reading: