The urge to vandalism

As a kid, I remember feeling utterly powerless. I couldn’t work. We were poor. Nobody took me seriously.

Felt like this when I was pre-teen too.

I also enjoyed natural disasters a lot. Since the rigid, limited, regular world suddenly changed, and all those people saying the world is the same, persistently bored or unimpressed and unshaken by everything, they at least went “woah”

So when I had the chance to influence something bigger, I did it. It felt empowering. That metal rod in the fence that looks indestructible? I can bend it. That huge rock decoratively placed over there? I can move it or flip it.

I felt whiffs of agency at the detriment of public tidiness and functionality

When a larger part of the population behaves like this, especially later into their 20s or 30s, you get very high maintenance costs for everything. You get an untidy city that is in a constant state of decay

But I can’t describe the exhilaration I felt when I moved the thing that seemed unmovable

Could cats have this same urge towards glass objects?

Perhaps if I engaged in some activities which channeled my natural tendency to express my agency, it would would’ve been unnecessary to experiment so much