What made me aware of the world of actors on the stage of the world, was a coma in January 4th 1994. It wasn't a accident or an illness of the body, but the results of drug abuse. To answer a quick question that usually comes up at this point in my story: is yes I did have an out of body experience. Yes I do know that what we call life is just a bump in our experience. Thus I am not stuck hoping its true nor having to force myself to believe its true, because I know through the experience that our bodies are an extension and do not all by themselves define who we are or what we are. We do that through the choices we make and I have no doubt about this either.

       

What happened to me as a result of the coma, a neurologist explained to me. He said do to the swelling that occurred as a result of having Spinal Meningitis that my neural pathways suffered some damage and that it would be some time before I was back to normal, but that he was really sure I would be back to normal as that is usually what happens in cases like mine. It has been over 20 years and things are not back to normal. 

Thank God!

What is not normal about I.

The symptoms of what I was going through is important information for people to get an idea of how I perceive things now versus before I was in a coma. I couldn't talk right, see right, or hear right. Couldn't read or write, even though I knew all the rules of both.  I couldn't breath consistently nor think in words as we all do all the time. At the time I was living in a state of terror. Not able to calm down because of the constant reminder that things where not normal and not knowing if this was going to be like this the rest of my life. It wasn't the rest of my life and really it took me a couple of years to comprehend enough about how the brain works, how perception works and what things like knowing vs believing or comprehending vs understanding was related to what was happening to me.

It turned out as best as I comprehend that it was a process that is hard wired into the body and brain that was causing me most of the problems. It is called Motor Reflex Functions. Most people if they bother to learn about this know that such things like breathing, heart rate, blood pressure are all Motor Reflexes that the brain sends a timed pulse to the body parts necessary to perform those functions. At the time that was pretty much all that was commonly known. I learned the hard way however that Motor Reflex Functions actually run most of our skills, like reading, writing, running, jumping or really just about everything that we do whether it be a mental exercise or a physical exerciser. The reason my perception is not normal is because of a process that occurs in the brain all the time.

It is called Neural Plasticity and what it does is a continual building of the Neural Pathways in the brain. What processes in the brain you use creates stronger physical connections in the brain depending upon how much or little you use the process. Vise versa when you stop using a process in the brain it begins fading physically from the brain. So there I was trying with everything in me to see the truth of my surroundings, thinking that because I couldn't see things like I had before the coma, that I had brain damage, which I did, but not how I was thinking. 

You see if the process of the brain that use specific Neural Pathways are not used those pathways begin to fad. I had damage to the Neural Pathways that wasn't letting me use the motor reflex functions that auto deleted certain ways of thinking in the brain. Thus I couldn't auto delete those thoughts and the whole time the Neural Pathways where being rebuilt to accommodate how I was perceiving my senses in the now moments. I think it was all because I was trying so hard to perceive things in a way that had some relations to what we would call the truth. 

These Motor Reflexes Functions are not extra's, but entirely necessary for any kind of interaction with the outside world. Even Neural Plasticity is a Motor Reflex, I think. As a result I can tell if I am dealing with a zombie or a living breathing being. It has taken me years to comprehend my situation. I am still formulating how to respond to the zombie's as I don't have to do anything but be I, with the living breathing beings. 

For better comprehension my situation one can look up:

1. Neural Pathways.
2. Neural Plasticity.
3. Spinal Meningitis.
4. Recovery using Physical Therapy

If someone has questions of any type one can ask in comments. Don't worry about making me feel bad as I have battle steel armor for skin.

All Photo's are from Pixabay. I am not responsible for if you think, what you think or how you think.Nor am I responsible for what you do as a result of thinking. You are.

Don't worry about making me feel bad as I have battle steel armor for skin.