SAJJAD'S MOTHER

ALTHOUGH I WAS VERY YOUNG AT THIS TIME, I CAN STILL TALK ABOUT YOU ABOUT THIS LATE. MY MOTHER LIED TO THE RAILWAY AND HELD ME CLOSE TO HER CHEST. WHEN HE WAS A CHILD, IT WAS BEEN THAT HE SHOULD NOT UNDERSTAND HOW HE WOULD FEEL THE DEATH. BUT AS SOON AS THE TRAIN WAS PRECIPITATED TO US, I STARTED TO SCREAM OF FEAR AND I ROSE MY MOTHER TO BE AWAY FROM THE TRACK. I SUGGESTED THAT I WILL NOT GRIEF THE LIGHT AND WOULD TRY TO GO FROM THE OTHER SIDE TOGETHER. BEFORE IT WAS TOO LATE, SHE WENT AWAY, STILL EMBRACING ME STRONG. IN THAT EMPTY ALLEY, MY MOTHER CRIED WHILE HE WAS NEXT TO HER. I WATCH IT, WONDERFUL, WITHOUT SAYING NOTHING. I HAD SEEN MY FATHER FIGHTING WITH MY MOTHER EVERY TIME. ONCE HE KNOCKED THE HEAD WITH A DISH AND BROKE THE PLATE IN PIECES. NORMALLY I HIDDEN UNDER THE BED DURING THOSE MOMENTS. SOMETIMES, I COVERED MY EARS AND TRIED TO IMAGINE THAT I WAS NOT PRESENT AT THAT SITUATION. MOST TIMES MY MOTHER TOLD ME THAT SHE WOULD TOLERATE ALL THESE TORTURES ONLY FOR MY FAULT. IN SECRET WE FOLLOWED SOME NIGHTS WHEN HE WENT TO LIVE TO A PLACE I NEVER KNEW. EVERY TIME I ENTERED IN CERTAIN HOUSE, MY MOTHER STARTED TO CRY. NOW UNDERSTAND, IT WAS A BURDEL. MY CHILDHOOD WAS NOT ABOUT GLOBES, TOY CARS OR COMETS. IT WAS TREATED OF SUFFERING. I LIKED TO STUDY EVERYTHING I TRIED TO NOT THINK OF THINGS READING BOOKS. ONE DAY, MY MOTHER FIREED ALL MY BOOKS AFTER THAT SHE HAD A BAD FIGHT WITH MY FATHER. I HAD NO FRIENDS AND I HAD NO PASSENGERS. THEY WERE THE ONLY PEOPLE IN MY LIFE. MY FATHER NEVER TALKED WITH ME AT THAT TIME. ONE DAY, IT TAKEN ME TO A FAIR OF PEOPLE. PURCHASED ALL I WANTED TO BUY AND MY MOTHER REQUESTED IT. WHEN WE TURNED, WE CAME PEOPLE LOOKING FOR OUR WINDOW. THERE WAS POLICE AND A GREAT MULTITUDE ROLLING OUR HOUSE. THE POLICE TAKEN TO MY FATHER WITH THEM. I WANTED TO ENTER OUR HOUSE, BUT NOBODY LET ME DO THAT. EVENUALLY I DISCOVERED MY MOTHER WAS BURNING LIVE IN OUR KITCHEN. I'M THIRTY-FIVE YEARS AGO NOW. I HAD LOVED SOMEBODY AND WANTED TO BEGIN A NEW LIFE AGAIN. BUT SHE ALSO LEFT ME BECAUSE I DID NOT WANT TO MARRY HER. I HAD TO BE FOLLOWING THAT SMALL CHILD WHO HAS BEEN LIVING IN HIS OWN HELL. HAPPY YEARS BUT REMINDS WERE REMITTED. IN THIS VICIOUS CIRCLE OF MY PAST, I'M STILL FIGHTING WITH ALL THOSE REMINDERS. - SAJJAD (35)