DANGEROUS: The Act of Self-effacing Blames
Several months ago I happened to be a part of the jury in a case involving a man convincted of patricide in which he pledged "not guilty" to the greatest surprise of everyone including both the judge and even the plaintiff given the list of evidences been lined out in procession.
What struck my mind the most and sometimes really drives me wild when I reminisce on that faithful day is the fact that the defendant on several occasions before the official rulling of the judge made some statements attendant to a list of claims that pointed out that he was not to be blamed.
In our daily lives we often are caught up in situations one way or the other which questions our attitude and the way we react to circumstances surrounding us. Whether we chose to accept responsibility for the cause of our actions or somehow try to maneuver the situation in a way that we can have someone or something to blame for everything is a matter of choice. But in the real sense it has been observed by a group of psychologists that the human mind is in a state of imbalance and only a few constants tend to create that stability needed, constants such as a caring family or friend, a daily activity that keeps our inner mind busy that we fail to notice the imbalances, or even a physical distress.
The question still stands, is it easier to accept responsibility and to control of the actions we've taken in the past or on the other hand put the blame on some reason or someone for our own shortcomings.
As point worth noting it is good to consider the factors that influence our choices on most occasions whether or not we accept our shortcomings.
•The Need to Impress Someone.
Most of us spend or entire life wasted on the need to please or satisfy a particular person or people in order to get their attention or friendship. It's observed that for any individual caught up between the Red sea of the crave for influence by others and the Pharaoh of accepting our wrongs and losing the trust of those with whom we've spent years trying to get their recognition, they always end up as captives of this situation. They always have the urge to shift the blame of their own undoing to someone or a situation just to retain their stands, but the truth is, does it really matter that you couldn't perform up to par, does it make the situation any better, It's all in the mind, you don't have to always look perfect when people behold your entire life in a glance.
•The Fear of Defeat and Failure.
This is seldom rampant amongst scholars, students and competitors who almost at every stage of their physical and mental endeavors are in constant pressure to maintain the balance of intelligence and the grandeur of success.
So should a small unexpected deprecating event occur due to their own negligence or unfitness, they always tend to look for the perfect excuse or a just cause to put the blame on. Not that it solves the problem at hand by shifting the blame but that it helps to maintain their supposed poise and quality. What then could be the consequences if these attitudes are constantly repeated, I'd say it breeds an intelligent irresponsible and untrustworthy fellow, one who would be likened as a sailor who the captain of some sinking ship would stall when it sinks. People with this kind of lifestyle can never wield the truth with pride.
•The Question of Sanity.
Years back there was an undisclosed case in the F.B.I about an agent who was so good at his job as a forensic analysts, but as nature would have her toll on him on his age and performance, gradually he started losing his touch on accuracy and efficiency. It got so bad to a point where he filed the report of another incidence for the case of a different situation, there and then he was called for questioning regarding his sanity and well-being. Few weeks later he discovered that his partner was assigned to monitor his competence at work and in the field, without him trying to convince his partner immediately that he was probably okay he decided to put on a show of perfection and good quality. But just like a rollercoaster the harder he worked and struggled to cross the T's and dot the I's the more he seemed to fail, but on every instance of his lapses it was observed that always had a plausible reason to put the blame on one situation or the other.
In conclusion it is paramount to note that for whatever reason we find ourselves in any position to deliver the best of quality, knowledge, skill, or any type of service at all, what gives us beauty above it all is that when we fail or fumble it does not necessarily mean we are incompetent or unqualified it simply shows that we are humans and we achieve perfection through a series of imperfections, and the greatest of all courage is to put the blame on oneself despite the odds and consequences it may pose to our life.
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