Can't wish you Merry Christmas

I am an immigrant. I couldn't take an Instagram photo of a beautifully decorated room with a massive Christmas tree. It's because I rent a box room in a shared house with strangers.

I also couldn't post a selfie with a big family around the Christmas table surrounded by tens of family members because they are just not there. I know at least three people who are suffering from depression at this very moment.

I am sorry, but I cannot take photos of Christmas lights seriously. I am an immigrant in the UK and there's no such thing as a TV-like Christmas dinner because it's only me and my mom. For hundreds of others, there's "me and Skype". And for many more, there's no one out there at all.

It's easy to feel festive when you're ten. I understand now why it's no fun when you're an adult and at least read the news. And if you have a tiny bit of empathy. In UK itself there are too many people who don't have a shelter tonight. Not mentioning Aleppo.
I am thankful for a dinner with my mom.

What brings me joy is knowing that we still have a chance to change tomorrow. That there's still that appointment with a doctor waiting to be booked, that a gym membership is quietly asking to be paid for and that you still have time to say sorry to someone you hurt. That there is room for improvement and if we really want to, we can become better.

And after all, if you change, I change.