I'm Afraid Of Eating In Front Of People...
I ordered off the senior citizen menu... Hoping that they'd bring me nothing. Just bring me a french fry, Just one.
When I saw the food, I immediately felt dread...
A huge portion size of grilled cheese.
Have I to eat this? Really?
Please no.
Secretly I hoped my date would go to the bathroom for the next hour so I could make it disappear.
I was paralyzed.
Why can't they have dogs roaming the restaurant? So I could quickly drop my food under the table.
Please disappear food... Please...
Being afraid of eating is the most bizarre fear I have. Luckily over the years, I've gotten better at it.
Fears Are Just Weird
Many fears just don't make sense. And this is one of them. We have this false assumption that certain things could happen if you are near your fear.
Oddly the fear didn't start until I was in high school. I'm not quite sure what sparked it. Maybe it was my long-term relationship. Where He also refused to eat.
It made dating awkward, we'd starve ourselves and refuse to eat, And many people didn't quite understand it.
No one told me that the way I ate was funny, Or that I shouldn't eat.
Maybe it's because I've spent most of my life fighting to stay a reasonable weight. That when I eat, People are judging my food choices, People are judging me. Because I'm not skinny.
Later on, I dated someone for six years, And it took me almost a year to finally take my first bite in front of him.
It was terrible. I'd go over to his house, And his family would offer me dinner. And I never wanted to be impolite. So I'd take a plate. Dish up as little as possible without looking rude. Then slowly eat the food while shaking uncontrollably and trying not to choke because I forgot how to swallow and chew.
Fears Can Be Silly
Sadly I wish once you saw how silly a fear was, It would go away. I realize it's crazy. Sometimes part of getting over fear as silly as eating takes practice. You just have to force it. Even though you don't want to.
I'm five dates in, With this new guy. And It's getting better. But I dread when he asks "Are you hungry" Because I know he wants the whole Dinner and movie type of date. It drives me crazy! Let's just get a soda from the gas station, And skip the food!
It's a crazy fear, Everyone eats. He knows at some point I've eaten food in my life. So it's odd eating in front of him.
Do you have any ridiculous fears like this?
Thank you for such an honest post, I had no idea what it was like to have this kind of fear of eating, I'm very glad you were able to conquer your fear. Love your posts!
Having fears is totally human but you have to take control about the fear, don't let the fear control your mind and your behavior.
The eating fear is just crazy hahaha
I have a fear of pain. I try to avoid it at any cost I do not think that's irrational. I didn't play football in high school because the fear of pain I didn't want to get hurt so I wrestled. Tell you this much there's a lot of pain with that I was trying to avoid it. I didn't learn how to ski cuz most of my friends broke their leg skiing and I can imagine a worse pain than a broken leg. I look back at life now at the things that I avoided because of Possible Pain I think of the things I really missed out on.
My wife and I have seen quite a few people who appear to be dating who should be afraid of eating in front of people. The way they attack their food, stabbing with the fork and slashing with the knife, both held vertically, it’s clear their parents never taught them how to use utensils. We can’t help but laugh.
@kaylinart Oh yes Fears, I think we all have some even if we don't want to talk about them. I have this Fear of what will people think if I actually tell them about the TRUTH of how they have lived their life. From the time they went through public school (indoctrination) into Adulthood and watching TV Programming. How they are bombarded with Advertising that makes them feel less than, and to TOP it all Off we don't really actually know about the EARTH we live on. Govt. has LIED to us all of our lives. Just look at the Monetary and Taxation system that we have adhered to, don't forget to pay your taxes. Alright enough of my RANT............Be Positive and FEAR NOT !
Yea, I do have fears like this, mine has to do with making a presentation or speaking in front of a crowd, I'm a very reserved person but unfortunately once in a while it becomes necessary to explain or give a talk on a particular topic to a group of people. In such cases I have never found it easy. Although I try to tell myself I've made some improvement recently because these cases have become more frequent but I'm yet to be as confident as I would want to be in this instances. What has helped me so far is also making myself realize that I these instances will keep coming up and also preparing myself mentally for when they do.
I believe everyone, or at least almost everyone, has some type of fear. Mine is, and always has been, being able to talk correctly. I had a really bad lisp while growing up. To the point that I had to go see a speech therapist. So, because of that I felt I was different than all the other kids.
That there was something wrong with me. I believe that to be my reason for shying away from interacting with others, among my fear of others.
Even to this day I only hang around a few people. I still fear judgement from anyone I talk to. Because I focus so much on what I say, I tend to trip
over my own words, and find myself getting tongue tied. I watch the reaction in the faces, to see if they "thought" I must be stupid. The only ones I am relaxed around, are those I have known a long time, because I know they are ok, and understand..
Maybe someday, we will all find ways to conquer these fears. Honestly, I too hate eating in front of others. I hate the way I chew, I guess.. :-)
@kaylinart Needs no fears, she is perfect as she is!
Hehe, you could eat anything you wanted in front of me, I wouldn't judge you or your eating, I would join in if it was a food I liked. ;)
It's understandable to have the fears though, but you shouldn't let judging looks affect you or how you feel. Accepting yourself as you are, what you want to aim for, and knowing you are going to get your goals when you are meant to, that is enough.
Be happy with yourself. <3 :)
hhh that happens to me as well when I date someone. But just in the first days then everything becomes normal with the time. I think it is the fear that something goes wrong. In our way of eating!Or what if the food falls on our clothes lol...
Things like that.
Fear is a primary feeling that we all experience from time to time. What does it mean the primary feeling? It is a natural and necessary feeling that helps to make appropriate action in an emergency. When we are faced with a dangerous situation through fear, we reduce the danger by choosing the most appropriate fighting, escaping or freezing behavior. But such an adaptive feeling turns into a problem that needs to be solved in some cases.If you feel an expectation that it will not be a real danger, this expectation is a fear that has become somatized, and if it causes some behavior and makes your life difficult, this is a fear that has become a maladaptive fear or anxiety.I hope my information is important to you... @kaylinart