This series of stories will be titled 'I'm surprised I turned out as well as I did, given my childhood ...' 64

Continued from This story

Party at my friend's. She invited lots of cool people, kids from school and her friends from where she used to live. I couldn't go unless I had a chaperon and my father just couldn't possibly take time off to fetch me.

Some guys monopolised my time and when I finally got away, I encountered a Knight in White T-shit...

All caught-up?

Good.

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The guy let the skinny one go and came over to us. “Hi Dave, this is Michelle,” Sara said.

“Yeah, I guessed,” he said.

Well, obviously Sara had told him about me. We spent the evening chatting and getting to know each other. I had not been expecting to ‘hook up’ with him when Sara arranged all of this.

I felt a little sick when he described their mad bomber friend’s injuries and I realised he’d held me in the chair using that hand… YUCK!

Suddenly, people spoke to me… I don’t mean strangers, people I didn’t know and had never seen before, I mean kids from school. It was like I’d suddenly become accepted. How weird that I hadn’t been noticed by them before, but now I was with a cool guy, I was cool enough for them.

Yeah, the films make sense when you think about it, that actually does happen and it’s tragic that some people are desperate to be part of the ‘in-crowd’.

I think, in some ways, I would have liked that skinny, scrawny, geeky, gawky ginger kid. She wasn’t that bothered, not that desperate to be in that ‘in-crowd’ that she’d do absolutely anything to be accepted. She had her own kind of style and sense of individuality and while she wasn’t a complete lone-wolf, she chose a few friends and made sure they were good friends rather than acquaintances that she didn’t care for and who didn’t care for her.

Back to the story!

I remember sitting on the floor in front of the chair I’d been on earlier. Dave sat on the chair and leaned forward, his arms around me. Yeah, that was a nice evening.

Eventually, I spotted the last one Sara had mentioned. She was older than us and had her eye on me because I was with Dave. I’d been warned about that so I was wary.

Dave offered to go up to the toilet with me, but I didn’t want him to. She followed me up the stairs and as I came out of the toilet, she said something. I can’t remember what.

We didn’t have a conversation, but she also didn’t have much of an attempt at intimidating me.

I came back downstairs and Dave was waiting for me. He looked a little concerned.

“Did she threaten you?” he asked.

“No, why would she?”

“She usually threatens girls I go out with,” he said.

“Oh, we’re going out, are we?”

OK then…

I was tired and decided it was time to go home. Dave took me. He didn’t drink so he was good to go.

Remember from the previous episode, my father couldn’t fetch me from Sara’s because he couldn’t get time off work…

Well, guess who was waiting at my house when I got home?

I didn’t give Dave a kiss or anything, I didn’t think it was appropriate, not with my father watching, especially.

Inside the house, after Dave drove off, my father said, “I thought Sara was going to be in the car with you?”

I shrugged. “We got on well so she didn’t need to come with us away from the party. I thought you couldn’t get time off work to fetch me?”

I’m afraid it was always the same. Rules could be bent or broken when it suited, unless it would be a massive disappointment to me. The chip on my shoulder was firmly in place and growing.

Dave phoned me over the next few days. He phoned every night. Sara was beside herself with excitement. She loved the fact that she’d got me a good boyfriend. She was a good friend like that. I did mention I choose my friends carefully…

The party was the talk of the school on Monday. A few that hadn’t gone were disappointed they’d missed it.

Sara wanted to talk about Dave and was thrilled I’d decided to go out with him on the weekend.

I gained a minor amount of celebrity status too. Everyone at the party wanted to know who the guy was I’d ‘copped off with’. They also seemed as excited as I was that I’d ‘finally’ got a boyfriend… I don’t recall it being such a big deal before… and I’m sure I went out with a few lads before him…

It was a bigger deal for them than it was for me that I’d finally, at last got someone to like me…

We went to a town close by, where Sara used to live. We met LOTS of people who knew her and obviously liked her because I was instantly accepted just because I was her friend.

Dave held my hand all evening, he was attentive and chatty and we had a great time. I got winked at by guys and chatted to by girls I didn’t know and it was a thoroughly awesome date.

Back at the car, we sat chatting. I don’t know what I expected, but I think it may have included a bit of kissing. Instead, he sat stroking the back of my head, saying how soft my hair was.

That’s what my father used to do…

I don’t know if you remember or not, but I mentioned that if I get a feeling that the guy I’m with is more ‘brother’ or friend material than boyfriend material, it completely shuts down any chance of a further relationship?

Well, unfortunately, that feeling arrived sooner than expected. Right after the hair-stroking, to be exact.

I mulled it over all week and we made plans to go out again. The nagging feeling that I wasn’t falling for him persisted.

It wasn’t helped by the fact that when Dave turned up to pick me up for our next date, he’d made an effort – he dressed up smart, had his hair cut and I just didn’t fancy him like I thought I did. I liked his hair a little long. I liked the jeans and t-shirt. I didn’t want a guy that would rather impress my father than me.

He entered the friend-zone, I’m sorry to say and I went back to being a social leper without a boyfriend.

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