The Structure of Personality: The basics with seven life changing questions.
Your Self-Ideal
Your self-ideal is that part of your mind composed of your values, virtues, ideals,
goals, aspirations, and your idea of the very best person that you can possibly be. In other words, your self-ideal is composed of those values that you most admire in others and most aspire to possess in yourself.
The most important part of your self-ideal is summarized in the word “clarity.”
Superior people are those who are absolutely clear about who they are and what they believe. They have complete clarity about the values they believe in and what they stand for. They are not confused or indecisive.
They are firm and resolute when it comes to any decision in which a value is involved.
On the other hand, weak and irresolute people are fuzzy and unclear about their values. They have only a vague notion of what is right or wrong in any situation. As a result, they take the path of least
resistance and act expediently. They do whatever seems to be the fastest and easiest thing to get what they want in the short term, giving little to no consideration or concern about the consequences of their acts.
The Evolution of Character. In biology, life forms are categorized from the least to the most complex, from single-celled plankton all the way up the increasingly complex spectrum of life to the human being. Similarly, human beings can be organized along a spectrum as well, from the least to the most developed. The lowest forms of humans are those with no values, virtues, or character. These people always act expediently and take the path of least resistance in their search for immediate gratification.
At the highest levels of development of the human race, however, are those men and women of complete integrity, who would never compromise their honesty or their character for anything, including the threat of financial loss, pain, or even death.
George Washington is famous for his honesty, which was demonstrated in the story in which he admitted that he had cut down the cherry tree. In the same vein, the founding fathers of the United
States wrote, “We hereby pledge our lives, our fortunes and our sacred honor” to the signing of the Declaration of Independence.
Fukuyama observed that societies worldwide can be divided into two kinds: “high-trust” and “low-trust.” He also argues that the highest-trust societies—those in which integrity is most admired, encouraged, and respected—are also the most law-abiding, free, and prosperous.
At the other end of the societal spectrum, however, are those societies characterized by tyranny, thievery, dishonesty, and corruption. Each of these are, without exception, both undemocratic and
poor.
Trust Is the Key. Trust is the lubricant of human relationships. Where there is high trust among and between people, economic activity flourishes and there are opportunities for all. On the other hand, where there is low trust, economic resources are squandered in an attempt to protect against thievery and corruption—or these resources are not available at all.
In the United States, we have the Constitution and Bill of Rights. These documents lay out the rules by which Americans agree to live. They create the structure of our government and guarantee our rights. But they assume that our elected representatives will be men and women of honor, committed
to protecting and defending those rights. They attempt to assure that only men and women of character can thrive and prosper over the long term in our economic, political, and social system. They aim to assure that, in most cases, only men and women of character can rise to high positions in society.
Although our system is not perfect, and people of questionable character occasionally rise to positions of prominence, it is seldom for very long. The basic demand of Americans for honesty and integrity eventually leads to the exposure and censure of dishonest people. The demand for men and women of character continues unabated.
Your Self-Image
Your Inner Mirror. The second part of your personality is your self-image. This is the way we see and think about ourselves, especially prior to any event of importance. People always tend to behave on the outside consistently with the way they see themselves on the inside. This is often called our “inner mirror,” into which we peer before we engage in any behavior.
When you see yourself as calm, positive, truthful, and possessed of high character, you behave with greater strength and personal power. Other people respect you more. You feel in control of yourself
and the situation.
What’s more, whenever you actually behave in a manner that is consistent with your highest values, your self-image improves. You see and think about yourself in a better light. You feel happier and more confident. Your behavior and outward performance then reflect this increasingly improving inner picture you have of yourself as the very best person you can possibly be.
People tend to accept you at your own evaluation of yourself, at least initially. If you see and think of yourself as an excellent person who is possessed of high character, you will treat other people with courtesy, grace, and respect. In turn, they will likewise treat you as a person of honor and character.
Your Self-Esteem
How Much You Like Yourself. The third part of your personality is your self-
esteem. This is how you feel about yourself, your emotional core. Your self-esteem is defined as “how much you like yourself,” but it’s more than only this. The more you see yourself as a valuable and important person, the more positive and optimistic you will be. When you truly consider yourself to be important and worthwhile, you will treat other people as if they are important as well.
Your self-esteem is largely determined by how consistent your self-image, which shapes your personal behavior, is with your self-ideal, or your vision of the very best person you can possibly be. Whenever you act consistently with who you consider an excellent person to be, your self-image improves and your self-esteem increases. You like and respect yourself more. You feel happy about yourself and others. The more you like yourself, the more you like others, and the more they like you in return. By acting with character and in harmony with your highest values, you put your entire life (internally and externally) into an upward spiral. In every area of your life, things will get better and better for you.
Your role models have a tremendous impact on shaping your character. The more you admire a person and his or her qualities, the more you strive—both consciously and unconsciously—to become like that person. This is why clarity is so important.
Take out a sheet of paper and write out your answers to these questions.
- Name three people, living or dead, who you most admire and describe one quality
of each of them that you respect. - Determine the most important virtue or quality in your life that you strive the most to
practice or emulate. - Identify those situations in which you feel the most confident, in which you feel like
the very best person you could possibly be. - What situations give you your greatest feelings of self-esteem and personal worth?
- If you were already an excellent person differently from today onward?
- What one quality would you like people to think of when your name is mentioned,
and what could you do to ensure this happens? - In what one area do you need to be more truthful and practice higher levels of
integrity than you do today?in every respect, how would you behave
After putting down the answers, check yourself, whether your decisiins are actually good or bad
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Lot's of good stuff here. It structures certain things with real-world grounding and without sliding into sounding too hokey.
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