We Must All Find Our Own Gardens

It was Alice Walker who said,
“In search of my mother’s garden, I found my own.”

My search and longing in life left me feeling like a child alone in this big world, just kind of wandering my way through. Ast least for a season anyway.

This poem reminds me of my curiosity and my search in life:

Once A Child

Once a child,
Naive, innocent and pure
Dancing and twirling
Flipping and jumping
Screaming and running wild.
Curiosity came to visit every now and then,
As I wandered all alone, it seemed, in this big old world
Now looking back, I know I had many guides.

Once a child, still a child, reflecting images
Of a God-sent beauty asking does it exist?
The line between now and then. And is it not,
A privileged joy to take a deep breath again and again.
As In the morning of my youth, my inner child I pray
That you will always be a part of me.

Once a child, always a child, unless I forget
And fall victim to coldness and despair.
Distracted by experience that becomes the mask I wear
But I remember still, the freshness of love and care
So rare, that blossomed from within unconditionally
Through the windows of my soul is born wisdom
And I am the embodiment of all the ages and phases of me.
~R.S.McDade

I must say I have searched to find my place in this world. It took me decades to find my voice.
And when I did it seemed I had so much to say.

And suddenly a reservoir opened and all these
Beautiful verbal creations came forth, and too came my opinions, my ideas, my teaching on the academics of which I had been taught.
And I also found my voice as an author in different genres of life.

There is nothing in life like the joy of being able to express ones’ self.
And when we can’t, frustration sets in.

I have been in many conversations or arguments to be more specific when I wanted to stop and walk away. I had resolved that I had said what I needed to say and that was the end.
Well it was only the end on my side of the conversation, the other person would shout “wait a minute, you did not let me finish, I need to say what’s on my mind.” Have you ever had a conversation like this?

Getting back on the subject, in addition to searching and finding my voice I also searched for my purpose, the work I felt I must do in my lifetime.
And I often compared my likes and dislikes to my mom and I soon discovered that our interest was in many ways very different.

So I sat out in my twenties to discover me, as I held on to the basics of life that my mother had taught me, such as good manners, patience and how a good attitude would take me a long way.
And I am happy to say I did find my garden in life, and I continue to nurture it daily.

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