Optimism at the End of the World #8 : Metaphors and how they "Make or Break" you. (Framing Part 2)

Our last Optimism post was about framing. One of the most overlooked aspects of framing is language or more specifically, metaphorical language. The metaphors you use (including idioms, cliches, and non literal usage of words, such as "take a break" or "a game changer") permeate every aspect of your life. They cause you to frame things in this way or that, dictating how you think about certain topics and deeply influencing the formation of your beliefs and opinions. They can make or break you. ;-)

This will be relatively short and to the point, there are entire books with scientific studies on this topic so feel free to do your own research on the impacts of language and metaphor.

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Language is metaphors

Language is, to a large extent, entirely metaphorical. The word "rain" isn't actually rain. It's a sound and a set of symbols which represent rain. This may sound like a really subtle, insignificant detail to focus on but it helps us realize that words are imperfect and that each person has their own understanding and associations connected to each word.

When I say the word "rain", most people probably think of water that falls from the sky, but they also may have different emotions tied to the word, based on their experiences, their culture, and the connections they've made with the word. Someone may first think of a drizzle while someone else may be reminded of a flood where they lost their home. I may subconsciously recall sayings or cultural references like "it's raining cats and dogs" or "it's raining men" or the happy image of "just singing, singing in the rain". I may also imagine the face of the Korean pop star, Rain.

Language is a framework for how you think

Because we are social creatures who have become accustomed to speaking and listening almost constantly, it's very hard to think without language. It's not impossible but, chances are, you have to make an active effort to do so. So what language you are raised in, what languages you learn thereafter, and how you grow accustomed to understanding and using your language become a large part of your thinking.

A simple example would be the word "brother". Do you have an image in your mind? Is it an older or younger brother? If you were raised speaking Chinese or Japanese, you wouldn't have to ask that question, there are separate words for "older brother" and "younger brother". In English, "big brother" refers to a surveillance state. In Chinese "little brother" could mean your younger cousin or a younger friend who is like a brother. It's also a cute way of saying "penis". These connections permeate the way we think, consciously and unconsciously.

Fun, right?

Traditional metaphors, slang, idioms and word choice

All words are metaphorical but we could say that some are more metaphorical than others. The more a word deviates from its original meaning, or the more it deviates from person to person or place to place, the more metaphorical we can consider it. The meaning of words is malleable. Avril Lavigne would be considered "punk" by exactly no one 30 years ago. "Conservative"and "liberal" have very different meanings than in the past. Now, the word "like" might conjure up thoughts of social media.

Some metaphors are so deeply ingrained into our language that we don't even realize they are metaphorical while others are cliches that stick out like a sore thumb. Some of these idiomatic metaphors and sayings can contradict each other, leaving us to choose which we want to subscribe to. Here are some examples of a variety of metaphorical language from cliches to euphemism to social concepts.

Stick out like a sore thumb
Time flies when you're having fun.
My life is in pieces.
You are my everything.
I'm tired as hell.
There are other fish in the sea.
Battleground states
Social Darwinism
A vicious cycle
Enough of your bullshit.
Networking
Expanding my horizons
He passed away
Going steady
One night stand
Sweet spot

Picking and choosing your language

Metaphors make language fun, but your word choice can either weigh you down or set you free. They can tie you to certain ideas and "trains of thought" (I'm becoming more and more self away of the metaphors I make, would you have caught that if I didn't put it in quotations?). They can expose your beliefs as well as limit your potential.

You may find that words with negative connotations affect you in a rather unpleasant way. Experiment with your metaphors and word choice to see how your ideas and emotions change. I made a conscious effort to get rid of all wording that wasn't in harmony with how I saw the world and found myself much clearer about what I believed and less susceptible to outside influence,

As you attempt to adjust your framing to become exactly who you want to be, take a look at what metaphors you use and think about if here are any that you might want to get rid of or at least keep in check. Try and look through your writing and find all the metaphorical language. It's everywhere! Feel free to share your findings in the comments.

My articles are written mostly from personal experience but I have skimmed through two books about metaphors that I found interesting.
I is an Other by James Geary - very in depth look at metaphors, including a look at many studies on metaphors and language.
Clean language by Wendy Sullivan & Judy Rees - a method of therapy and coaching focused on metaphors created by the patient.

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