Cheering them up

Seeing someone we love suffer can be extremely painful.
In such cases, and from a place of deep empathy, we may quickly jump to problem solving: looking for ways to help them and find a solution to their situation.

Although problem solving can be extremely helpful in certain scenarios, it is also true that at some points in life, rather than a solution, what we need from others is the ability to contain our emotions. What would that look like? Simply letting the person who is suffering know that they can cry, that they can feel fully without their emotions generating rejection or distance from the other person. Of course, this will require an ability to bear the other person's pain, which not all of us have in equal measure. However, it is a skill that I recommend practicing, above all because it strengthens intimate and close relationships in the midst of vulnerability. How can you do this? Ask the other person what they need from you and, as far as possible, offer it to them.

Sometimes it may be a hug, a shoulder to cry on, a cup of coffee, or just a silent presence. All of these things can be a HUGE help to someone who is suffering, sometimes much more than a solution.