It's been 2 years since my last post.

Hi guys!

It's me, Glenn, your friendly neighbor. It's been a long time since I posted here. I just want to write something since I want to divert my attention for a while. I'm broke, not financially though. My heart felt broken this past few days, weeks, months, or maybe years. I don't know as sometimes it just felt numb. I'm really sorry if this sounds so "girly" and/or not appropriate for a man to write this kind of stuff but well this is me.

I'll start my story here whether you like it or not. Haha!

Tonight, I just confessed my feelings to a girl who I admired the most back in my high school days. Yes, you are right, it didn't went well. You know why? It's because of her ex-boyfriend. She's still inlove with him. Sad, right? The boy chose another girl and dump her like she's not worthy. But again, she's still hoping that someday her ex-boyfriend would still come back. I know it's just dumb of her to act that way but sometimes I realized we were alike in some ways.

Let me share my amazing lovelife story first. After my broke up with my ex-girlfriend I tried saving our relationship and holding to a speck of dust for 2 years in hopes that we can be together again. Those hopes and sacrifices gone to ashes after I found out that my ex-girlfriend already has her own family. Sad. After discovering those things, my only companions are cigarettes, alcohol, and computer games. I also demand overtime from my company to divert my attention from the calamity. Yes, that hit me too hard that I couldn't imagine I would still go for a serious relationship again. Until 2 years have passed, I met my high school crush again. We've been hanging together with our high school classmates during our rest days at work. We also shared our work experiences/events and including our past relationships. You can say we've became bestfriends. We talked a lot, shared a lot with ourselves. But everytime our conversations slipped relating to relationships, I can see her sadness. Her sadness through her tones, the sadness through her eyes, and the sadness through her smiles. I wish she let those tears flow through me, I wish I can wipe those dry, I wish I can hug her tight, I wish I came early, I wish I confessed early. I could have saved her from the storm. Sometimes, I recall how I'd love to brush her hair during school days because she's at my front row seat. If only I was frank with my feelings those times, we could have both saved our hearts. It's too late.

The replies to my confession hurt me a lot but I'm still grateful she did tell me how she feels. She said that I'd better stop it because she don't want to ruin our friendship. I too don't want to ruin it ever. She's not totally healed. She chose not to leave me hanging or play with it and said that I deserved better. I deserved better? No! "She" deserved better! Even if that "better" is not me.

It's funny but sometimes frustrating to imagine that some people only chase the love they think what they deserve. Don't chase the person who flees, stay true and the right person will do anything to be with you.

I guess I wrote more than what I'd hope for ang Thanks God I released some steams with this. May this open letter help someone's story. If you have something in mind that you can share with me, please put it on the comment section and I'd be glad to read it.

Regards,
Glenn