Arranged or Love Marriage?

In India arranged marriages are very common and they are successful also. Around 4 decades back majority of the marriages were arranged marriages and there were very few love marriages, and those marriages barely failed. Then the wave of love marriages started and now arranged marriages are very few. Both of them are good in their own ways. In an arranged marriage too, there is consent of both the partners and it's not like it's done forcefully for either of the partner.

Mine was a love marriage and I am completely for it but sometimes I do fancy the idea of arranged marriage also. It's like you have to explore life with a person you do not know very well. Yes, there can be a risk in that. In a couple of meetings before the wedding you will not know the person fully, so you never know what temperament the person holds. It can be for either partner. Whereas in love marriage also, it cannot always go smoothly, because you know each other so well you may start taking each other for granted. With time every person grows, so whether love or arranged there is good possibility of the partner's personality to change. In love marriages also I keep hearing people say, he or she is not the same person I knew before marriage.

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In Indian families in a marriage there is lot of family influence, so while in love it is only about the two people, while in marriage it becomes about managing many other people along with your spouse and those influence does impact the quality of marriage. There is always a risk in arranged marriage about not knowing complete truth about the person. My cousin sister had an arranged marriage, before the wedding all the good sides of the boy were boasted to a super high level. My sister did get carried away and agreed for the marriage. They barely met 3 times before their wedding and in that time, everything was shown very good, but after the marriage barely in a couple of months everything changed. The boy's parents' interference was way beyond tolerance. Later we also got to know that all the jewelry that they gave to my sister in the wedding rituals was fake. As per out customs gold jewelry needs to be given. My sister tried to make it work out, but in the end after 5 years gave up and separated. So, such things can happen, there is always a risk. But the % is less and it's not like all arranged marriages can be deceitful.

Anyways Love or Arranged, I just believe that it is a wonderful relationship to explore together with a person for life.

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