The Urge to Be Understood Without Opening Up is Wrong!

in #mindset5 years ago

Hi, dear Steemians!

A lot of people think that success in life is all about your attitude and thought towards hard work and perseverance. That is why most motivational pieces are often centered around ideas regarding productivity, hope, determination, and etc.

But being successful and living a fulfilled life is not just about concepts mentioned above. The way you interact with other human beings and carry your character in society determines a great deal about who you are and the kind of life that you live.

Today, we are going to talk about being understood by our fellow human beings.


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Some of us are under the wrong impression that the people around us cannot really understand our feelings and thoughts.

In truth, we are the ones who shut ourselves away and do not open up about such feelings and beliefs to those closest to us.

We erroneously believe that they should be able to guess or predict how we are feeling or what we are thinking about.
This roots back to when we were merely infants. In that time, our needs and desires were quite simple.

We were either hungry, tired, or dirty. If not that, we humbly needed someone to comfort us and take us in their embrace.
But as we grew older, our needs, feelings, thoughts, and desires grew more and more complicated with us.


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The only difference being, that we still think that other people should ‘understand’ us and that we don’t need to explain ourselves.

This is as wrong as it is dangerous to our well-being. We cannot expect people to take up subtle clues and understand our inner dilemmas. What would be the point of communication and talking if all our inner desires and needs were apparent?

When we think like this, we tend to get irritated when other people do not understand us. We might think that they are distant, aloof, or simply, too stupid to understand the complexity of our character.

The result of this is bitter isolation. The feeling of being left out. The feeling of not belonging.


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This is hugely important because it indicates how we conduct ourselves in social situations. Our relationships with different people play a huge role in our happiness and success.

Being able to open up and actually ‘speak’ is really important if we want other people to understand us.

The feeling of loneliness that drives from the idea that there aren’t a whole lot of people who understand us can be truly devastating.

Change that by letting go of your ego and opening up to those that you can trust. The result will be a state of peace and inner tranquility that will surprise you.

A BIG HUG!

@chbartist

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Important Note!

I have been working very hard on this blog since the beginning. I have a very busy life but I am giving my best and believe me I have shared experiences that I have been coaching thousands of people and I know that the change of the Mindset should be daily. I am already grateful to see you giving upvotes to each other and you can see this with the fact that many already have 8, 9, 10 upvotes. But I'm sure that with the effort of all of us we will see a community with, more and more upvotes each others and for that everyone should get engaged so we can make it come true. I believe and we can! Resteem...

***Remember Community: Please, if you commented and upvote on a new post I did, please always go back to the previous one because if someone in the community commented lastly because of time zone differences it will be without your upvote and that would not be fair.

You all know the goal! We can reach: More and More Upvotes each others!

Attention!!!

I'm reading all the meaningful comments from the posts.

I am here making a list of all of you who have helped build this community by voting for each other who write meaningful comments and soon I will respond to everyone with comment and thank you all because I can already see this spirit being built in this Positive Mindset community and help between all of you.

You will receive my upvote in all material and brief comments I will do this in all the posts I am following very closely and I can see what the people who are generous and contribute to this legacy that I am trying to build with all of you can become reality in a short time.

AND

First of all, I would like to thank all of you, who are the most active and proactive in this community, showing your generosity and always with meaningful comments. From now on I will always make a list of these incredible people who have helped to expand our goal of growing ever more.

But I ask that if you are new around here you read many of the previous posts because they make it clear that we are building a community with respect among all, generosity and this blog is for those who really want to start moving their Mindset to positive and moreover be part of the growth of all of us who contribute to this blog. Please do not ask to include you in the list if you are just wanting upvotes because we want here people genuinely attuned to growth and good attitudes and as I have always said with Respect as the basis of all, generosity and positivity!

ABOUT OUR LIST!!! WE NEED GROW THIS LIST! LET'S GO TOGETHER IN THIS COMMUNITY - RESTEEM!

Feel free if you want to be included in the list of contributors to this community. Just ask at the end of your comment.

@juanmanuellopez1 @moghul @coolguy222 @newageinv @gowealth @blessed-girl @cruis @lexymaine @alokkumar121 @aceandnotes @darlenys01 @rafique1953 @marvyinnovation @wems @ajks @alaisguineasis @amnlive @kimmysomelove42 @praditya @tommyl33 @samryan @vickykarma @brightsun @oppongk @kryp70kn1gh7 @hobo.media @theticket @royer94 @bradley028 @nummulshrma @maxijgcomm @maikelblogo @mrblu @nancymj @petervi @mcoinz79 @missabigail @saludoalalma @mcnestler @moarafatshow @gargi @luis402 @rem-steem @shahzadeh @sumon-ar-vines @naijauser @yantrax @josema.saborido @khan.dayyanz @shapescooper @aceofhearts @marcocosta @rvag5 @fusroj @cashlane @borrowedearth @michaeljn @kchitrah @mitchhunter @nataliaeline @cherlianny @unknownphoton @unclefz @gardengranny @bettyamv @ghostwriter9 @wandrnrose7 @nancybriti @missladybug @shirophantomhive @rvag5 @ankitjnv @marvyinnovation @tommyl33 @gowealth @ustaadonline @daio @brightsun @mzubairch @lightestofideas @amit1995 @starapple @treodecimo @edinhazard @maxijgcomm @wasito @mariita52 @maroni55 @nataliaeline @ajtech2596 @keithf @wesleyvanderstel @grainsofsand @mariita52 @naijauser @castleirwell @juanmanuellopez1 @moghul @coolguy222 @newageinv @gowealth @blessed-girl @cruis @lexymaine @alokkumar121 @aceandnotes @darlenys01 @rafique1953 @marvyinnovation @wems @ajks @alaisguineasis @amnlive @kimmysomelove42 @praditya @tommyl33 @samryan @vickykarma @brightsun @royer94 @bradley028 @nummulshrma @maxijgcomm @maikelblogo @mrblu @nancymj @petervi @mcoinz79 @missabigail @saludoalalma @mcnestler @moarafatshow @gargi @luis402 @shahzadeh @sumon-ar-vines @naijauser @yantrax @josema.saborido @khan.dayyanz @shapescooper @aceofhearts @marcocosta @rvag5 @fusroj @cashlane @borrowedearth @michaeljn @kchitrah @mitchhunter @nataliaeline @cherlianny @unknownphoton @unclefz @gardengranny @bettyamv @ghostwriter9 @wandrnrose7 @nancybriti @missladybug @shirophantomhive @ankitjnv @marvyinnovation @tommyl33 @gowealth @ustaadonline @daio @brightsun @mzubairch @lightestofideas @amit1995 @starapple @treodecimo @edinhazard @maxijgcomm @wasito @mariita52 @maroni55 @nataliaeline @ajtech2596 @keithf @wesleyvanderstel @grainsofsand @mariita52 @naijauser @castleirwell @isabelpereira @nulifeiq @royer94 @yaleal @ushmil @nisiryan0522 @reveurgam @certain @kkins @nurseanne84 @robertyan @xtophercruzeu @theureview @anil566 @freedomanytime @clayrawlings @zetacoin @goldheart @artoftherhyme @jiujitsu @don-thomas @arsl14 @vishalmajumdar @thehippierays @kemc @aple @orgoniteog @abrish @zydane @cathynsons @shashiprabha @katebobkova @tramelibre @sanjoea @savedanimals @kshahrck @filmyworld @syedahmed1010 @iknoweverything @hashzone91 @bernard4ve @afruza @fareed974 @leidy3 @xcountytravelers

Thanks All of You!!!!

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Great post - I sometimes have to meet with people I wouldn't really chose to hang with. Somewhat because they don't get me, but mainly they have decided I'm not good enough for them.

I constantly reset my preconceptions and tell myself it's their problem, and each time they apply a manipulation, I tell myself to feel sorry for them, call them out if needed.

The most important thing is to love your fellow humans, realize no one is perfect..It's impossible to be angry at some one, if you have nothing but good intent and love in your heart/good feeling to all those around you.

You should open yourself up in order to get on a more personal and profound level.

Ciertamente para ser entendido y comprendido por otro es menester que podamos ser abierto, brindar confianza y tener la disposiciòn de interrelacionarnos con nuestros semejante. Sòlo de esta manera podemos soltar aquellas ideas, pensamientos y preocupaciones que nos aquejan y asì sentir un alivio espiritual porque has exteriorizado algo que tenìa represado. Por supuesto como dije antes hay que dar y recibir confianza, porque no a todo el mundo se le puede fiar nuestros problemas, preocupaciones, alegrìas ya que muchos de ellos o no les interesa o simplemente no se solidarizan con el projimo.

An excellent review @chbartist and the biggest mistake is that we decide to achieve something alone no matter what. You are right, need to change it in yourself and make all possible contacts at any level, try to find a common language with everyone and then our goal will be much closer to us!

Communication in society is a science. If you want to feel full of vitality, emotionally stable and to gain respect, you must first know yourself. Self-knowledge will help build relationships with others on the basis of empathy, trust, love and respect, happiness and common goals.

Nice topic and I feel this is connected to everyone and no matter which fields person belongs to. I share my example here. I interact with everyone at my workplace and there are many people who are not in my department but i do interact with them when I see them. This makes them feel comfortable and even I am familiar with them. Wherever I get any work in which they can help, they do it immediately and don't delay at all. There are some people in my team who don't talk Unless ins required and they face issues due to this habit of theirs. To get their work done they have to follow with depts many time and that too with proper official process which in my case is not required because they are my friend and I just ask them in a friendly way for their help.
They help immediately whenever i need. This is good practice and I believe we all must maintain a relationship with people around us. It always helps.. thanks @chbartist for nice post.

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Oh yes @chbartist, a very correct motivation, and I completely agree with you that can not withdraw into yourself and keep away from people. Sociability is a very important thing in any field, especially if it’s necessary to do something important and necessary!

Sometimes we are afraid to confide to others because we have the prejudice of being judged by them. There are three foundations of success which are the following: capacity, character and connection. Although you have the ability and the right attitude to win; you cannot move forward without connection. Connection is the ability to mingle and communicate with others.

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Saludos @chbartist! la comunicación es importante en un mundo donde la informacion es un producto de mucho valor.

El comunicarse de manera efectiva requiere que conozcamos a nuestro interlocutor, luego configuremos el mensaje al tipo de interlocutor, y por ultimo mantener una comunicación fluida que pueda enriquecerse con la participación de las partes involucradas

Para poder lograr lo anterior se debe generar niveles de conocimiento, de aptitudes y actitudes que solo se consiguen con los estudios y la practica

Un ejemplo de comunicación enriquecedora es la que notamos en Steemit, donde el emisor debe pensar un tema, desarrollarlo, exponerlo, y luego recibe de manera de retro-alimentación el aporte del receptor, que luego se convierte en emisor, generando un nuevo ciclo que mantiene viva la conversación, teniendo como resultado una construcción de conocimientos.

Being open up and speaking is really important.
I agree from your point of view.
Keep up with amazing and inspiring content.

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