Contentment: Peaceful or Defensive?
I’ve often heard people say that it doesn’t matter if we’ve failed over and over again because we should be content with what we get in life. Quite honestly, this mentality drives me nuts.
Well of course you’re right, mate. We should be content with what we get in life, but here’s what you’re missing. We should be content with what we get in life - AFTER WE HAVE TRIED OUR BEST TO DO THE BEST WE COULD DO AS MANY TIMES AS WAS POSSIBLE WITH LIMITED RESOURCES THAT WE HAD AVAILABLE.
As a matter of fact, most of the people who keep whining about being content never fulfill these conditions in the first place.
Here’s what I think - If you’re trying something again and again, and you’re failing again and again then there is a great possibility that there might be something wrong with the way you are doing it. Why on Earth would someone want to be content with doing something the wrong way unless he’s too stubborn to admit his mistakes and put in some real effort? That’s it gentlemen! It’s what I call the ‘Defensive Contentment’. Such a person is not content because he’s tried every possible way to make a situation better. Instead, he’s content because he wants to perceive himself and be perceived as a victim of determinism without taking responsibility of his choices and actions.
The worst thing about this mentality is that it denies contentment the peace that it brings when it is experienced in a real way. One might never find peace in knowing that he tried the best he could. Rather he will always feel like the victim of his circumstances and situations.
Never settle for less in the name of contentment. Success is the peace of mind that comes with the knowledge that you tried the best of what you were capable of. This, and only this, is what you should be content with.
Again... Very interesting post. I don't like extremes like "...and only this" because of course I believe there are exceptions to the rules. But I see your point, and tend to agree with your observations to an extent.
I used to have a friend who struggled with the concept of being discontent when he was in a place where he thought he should be thankful. He questioned whether he was asking for more when he should be content with what he had. Another friend who was a pastor said that there were times when it was good to desire more, as long as you had the right perspective. He said he called it a "holy discontent". 😄 I liked that phrase immediately and have used it often since.
He explained it as something where you are satisfied with where you are and not ungrateful with the situation before you,but happy to know that you are free to choose to pursue more... Knowing that the pursuit of more doesn't make you selfish or unconsolably dissatisfied with your current situation, but just willing to see if more is good, and right, and appropriate to pursue.
I find myself testing that balance often. And usually, all the better for it!
Haha I think about this feeling every time I see someone defending his laziness in the name of contentment but I never knew what to call it. Now Holy Discontent is one heck of a term 😂 Thanks again for the feedback 🥳
Hahahhaa nice!!!! Glad you enjoyed it!