How to learn to give and receive feedback constructively?
A person will never advance if they are unable to take constructive criticism or suggestions. It's a startling but incredibly accurate remark.
Criticism is an emotionally sensitive topic for a lot of individuals. They have hot flashes just thinking about delivering or getting criticism.
Why do so many people find feedback to be such a sensitive subject?
Feedback is frequently interpreted as an assault on the individual receiving it. For instance, the ensuing interpretation—which is frequently subconscious—is something like, "You don't support me, you think I'm worthless as a person, I've completely failed."
Here are some pointers for responding appropriately to the circumstance...
If you're not happy, start by asking yourself what's upsetting you and what you would like to see changed. Instead than wasting time criticising, make suggestions for improvements or alternate approaches.
Pick the appropriate moment to voice your concerns and critiques. Critiquing an individual in the midst of a group is often ineffective. Don't hesitate to express your opinions, either. Clarify your questions and criticisms.
Pay attention to how the other person responds. Reiterate the situation in detail if she becomes defensive or starts talking about something else. Ask the person you're speaking with to clarify whatever they think they got from what you said if you don't think repeating yourself will help. Stay true to who you are and don't veer off topic.
Try to negotiate about what you want the other person to do, and trust your feelings in the process.
DON'T reply with any of these four simple strategies:
Combat: avert the counteroffensive by saying, "It's your fault, you started.
"I can't do anything about it, it's not true, I didn't know," is how you should defend yourself.
Avoid: Putting off dealing with the matter in advance (you will have to deal with it eventually).
Ignore: staying silent, hoping it goes away
You forget that the criticism is directed at the other person in these four scenarios.
How are you able to help?
Until you are certain of what the other person wants from you, keep asking questions.
Go over the key points of the exchange: "If my comprehension is correct, you are upset that I did not follow the agreement?"
Don't start a dispute, launch a counterattack, or defend oneself. The other person's dissatisfaction and desire for a change in the circumstance is what matters.
React only to what the other person says (that is, only to what you hear, not to what you believe you heard or interpreted).
Make it clear what you plan to do in response to the other person's query; if you believe they are correct, express this and, if necessary, offer an apology.
Thank your interlocutor for their insightful comments if they offer you criticism that you find helpful. Lastly, make every effort to come to a mutually agreeable settlement as soon as you can.