The first one would have to be, as everyone else says, Are you happy, what else can I do for you that doesn't involve feeding you filet mignon 8 times a day?

Any other questions would have to be philosophical in nature. do you really not understand time? How terrible is it when I leave for the day? Why does the vaccuum cleaner scare you so much? How can such a small dog take up so much room in a king size bed?

WHY OH WHY DO YOUR FARTS SMELL SO BAD

You know, real meaning of the universe type stuff.