The Retarded Ogre

The Retarded Ogre carried a block of cheese that they would sit and look at. It was a curious thing to do, to me and my wife, but not to the Ogre, who thought it would be sublime. Who would have thought, a block of cheese being the item selected.

The Retarded Ogre carried a magic 8 ball that they would try to balance on their head. This seems a fairly odd exercise, to my grandma, but not to the Ogre, who assumed that it was in fact, entertaining. You wouldnt have thought, a magic 8 ball is the item to select.

The Retarded Ogre found a can of Tango that they sometimes put up their bum. This seems to be an astonishing action, to me, my mum and my dad, but not to the Ogre, who had come to the conclusion that the idea was miraculous. Who would have imagined, a can of Tango is the thing to opt for.

The Retarded Ogre found a mug that they sometimes break. It might be a fairly bizarre activity, to some, but not to the Ogre, who had come to the conclusion that it was in fact, awe-inspring. Who would have imagined, a mug is the item that was chosen.

The Retarded Ogre owned a sword to hug. This could be considered a new action, to me, my mum and my dad, but not to the Ogre, who had decided that it was in fact, the most awesome idea. A sword was the thing that was chosen.

The Retarded Ogre desperately looked for a can of coke to hug. One might say this is a weird proposal, to some, but not to the Ogre, who considered it would be epic. Bizarrely, a can of coke was the item that was opted for.