_{Does the title make it sound like this is going to be a love story? Good, because in a way, this is.}

For the first time in my life, I made love to the camera that is not my own, and I loved it!!

I think I’m most known for my self portrait work, and I have written many times why I do them myself instead of modelling for someone else. Long story short, it never felt right. I feel awkward in front of someone else’s camera and quite often the style is not what I like. Every once in a while I try to work with a photographer, to see if something good would come out of it.

I started talking to a photographer on Tinder last week (don’t judge me), and we hit it off pretty nicely and decided to meet up over the weekend. I didn’t say for certain that I would model for him, because I wanted to make sure I feel comfortable around him before I agree to anything. We hit it off instantly and had so much fun just hanging out, so by the time it was a soft evening light, I was so ready to be in front of his camera. I'm usually the type of person that runs and hides if someone points the camera in my direction, but this time I did the opposite and went straight to posing.

A few photographers have shot me before, but I have never felt that good about it, for one reason or another. I could never pose confidently, especially if it was something sexy we were going for. I felt like every time someone would try to shoot me, I retrieved to my shell and couldn't do the same things I would if I was shooting self portraits. I have had some fun, but never anything close to this time, and I think the results speak for themselves.

Modelling is so fucking easy when I don’t have to worry about the focus, lighting, framing the image etc etc. It felt AMAZING! This time I also had the added benefit of getting the RAW files to myself and being in control of post process, which made me feel a lot better because in the end, I would be in control of everything. I think a lot of photographers ruin the shots in photoshop by doing way too much and in a style that I hate.

Modelling for this particular photographer was like a holiday for me, it was so damn easy to just pose and not be the photographer at the same time. Sure, it takes a lot to be a model too, you have to maintain a good body and all that, but the actual being in front of a camera is so damn easy, it’s almost ridiculous. No disrespect toward real models, but damn, you got it easy, enjoy it! Self portraits are so much harder to do, and even though I love it, it’s nothing compared to just modelling for someone else.

We talked about this with the photographer quite extensively, because I was so shocked about really enjoying myself while modelling. We came to the conclusion that is a lot to do with having similar style in photography, having trust, and in general, being comfortable with that person. For me, modelling and photography is quite intimate, so I don't want to do either of them with people I don't like.

I felt happy, free and sexy. I felt like I could do anything and I could try anything, no judgement or fear. I was just having fun, and so was the photographer too. It didn’t feel like work, it was pure fun and games. I was basically flaunting myself to the camera and completely enjoying myself while doing it. I got a few compliments on knowing how to pose, which is quite the compliment for me as I'm used to just doing it for my own camera. I definitely want to model more and get better at imagining what the camera sees when I'm in front of it.

If modelling would feel like this all the time, it would be the only thing I ever wanted to do!

FAQ (I assume)

Are we going to shoot together again? Probably yes.

Am I going to stop self portraits? Hell no!

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_{The pictures is this post are outtakes and you can see my genuine smile and that I truly am having a good time.
Photography by Juho Jääskeläinen, post process by me.}