Depression is a cruel foe that I know as well... but it is also a liar. You ARE going somewhere. You have bravely resisted the pull of nicotine for a week (and yes, there is withdrawal, but you can get through it). Your poetry is beautiful, and being recognized for meeting the gaze and the needs of others. You have gained the support of two big curation trails and a follower -- me.
Don't give up. You've got 20 years added to your life if you resist the temptation to go back to smoking. You are hitting a poetry stride. Don't give up. The journey has to be taken step by hard step -- just keep writing and moving forward. You are not alone. Don't give up.