Black stain

I opened the sheet of my memory
So many memories I have forcibly removed
A friend reminded me of one moment we shared
But why I dont remember it at all ???

Only a few sheets I remember
togetherness with people I love gradually began to fade away
Forgotten by life and age
Will I forget You later ????

I'm very jealous of You all ...
Why You have a beautiful past...
Why did not I ... this is not fair to Me
I hate myself, I will not open again this old wounded ...

Why is it so easy for You to be happy ...
laughing freely without feeling the slightest burden ...
Far...far I've stepped left from you ...
Just because I feel not good enough with You guys ...

Alone... this will be better for Me
This the way of concealing my low self-esteem
Being in the middle of you is like a stranger to me
I have to get away ... far away from you

I think... I've changed now as time passes
But not evenclose ... I'm still my old one
Still not good enough be around you ...
I realize now...why I have forcibly removed Our's from this memory ...
I am a black stain in our friendship ...

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