Dear Abigail,
Thank you for this post. So many thoughts, so many associations came to mind. You described the challenge each of us faces: as members of a social group with an interdependent structure, how do we become self reliant and not need approval in order to feel worthy.

I very much liked your reference to @holm's bicycle journey. This reminded me of the rites of passage many cultures require of adolescents--often these rituals include seclusion. The rituals are supposed to be journeys of self discovery, and lead to self reliance.

When you described existential loneliness, I couldn't help thinking that, to a certain extent, this may be a symptom of modern times.

Option 1 can be a rather alienating choice. It gives rise to despair as you just become weakened by the acute awareness of how impossible it is to make an escape. One ends up just sitting at the shore of the island staring at the void and feeling sorry for oneself.

I think perhaps in cultures where all answers are provided by an ethos...call it a mythology, religion, world view...the sense of a void is less common. If a moment of wonder or doubt arises, these are usually assuaged by referring to a comforting set of beliefs.

Of course, this blog was personal for me, as are all your blogs. I won't share details, but I am heartened by your assertion that, no matter how old we may be, we are works in progress :)

Thanks again for giving me food for thought, for expressing profound ideas in a way that each of us can find relevant. We come away enriched by your insights.

With admiration, respect and affection,
Your New York friend,
AG