RE: Today is the international day of mental health - don't forget to hug your beloved psychopath:)
Recalling your last post, I am very positive that this is a step in the right direction for you, finally.
There is someone I know, who's really close to me, in a similar state lately. So yes, I can somewhat relate to what you're going through and how difficult it can be to have no clarity about anything in your surroundings. However, what I do know by now that this is certainly a war of your own, a fight within, and it has to be fought by yourself regardless of how your loved ones try to be there for you, the doctors, all the therapies, etc.
In the end, it's you and your soul that needs to collect those broken pieces shattered everywhere, and put them all in the right place where they used to belong. Easier said than done, yeah, but trust me, this is the only element that will work for you someday. So just take your time, go with your pace and not what others tell you, do the things your way. Eventually, I hope and pray that things start to get better for you.
Lastly, do know that this is going to be step by step, day by day - So don't even worry about the time factor. Time is on your side. Just try to win it inside you, the outside will just follow your triumph.
Thank you for kind words, but it's not what I'm talking about.
Let me make this clear again here. I have no broken soul, no unrequited love, no all this. I just have a bipolar disorder and need to seek for right medication, that's all. It has nothing to do with "winning one day", it's just a cycle which I live in, and it's really hard.
Which is why I mentioned that this could just be the right medication for you, eventually. Since you mentioned in your earlier post that you tried with a few doctors and it didn't work out for you. The only addition I made was that medication, alone, might not help you to an extent where it just goes away. The reference I made was not a similar scenario to yours in all it's entirety, but just to let you know that there are other internal/external factors too that do contribute more than you think they might or could.
And the 'cycle' you're talking about, when I said 'win your own war', my point was to be part of that cycle since you can't just get out of it, yes, but be a part of that in a way that has, to some extent, elements of positivity for you. We all have our own dynamics of life, don't we? We're all consumed and connected with events, moments and everything else that we can't just part ways from. So what I meant was to rely on your willpower and strengths in a broader perspective, in addition to the medication, even though you've find the right sort of medication or the doctor. This combination is what I believe can work for you, both in the short and the long-run.