Navegating the Kattegat in the dark.

Summation:
Dastardly Captain Tobixen, shiftier than a Kattegat current, more treacherous than a sudden sandbar; rampages in Copenhagen after Shanghaiing (crimping) impressing his crew of one. Flies his colors from a boat hook dhingy.

Pardon my parody, your adventures make me want to drop everything and go do some carefree island hopping.