Leadership Skills That Make a Real Difference

You don't need a corner office or a fancy title to be a leader. Maybe you're the one your friends ask for advice, or you help your kids' sports team stay organized, or you just naturally step up when things get messy at work. That's leadership too.

Here's the truth: leadership isn't about being perfect or having all the answers. It's about caring enough to help make things better for everyone around you.

Just Listen – Really Listen

We all know that person who talks at you instead of talking with you. Don't be that person. The best leaders I know are the ones who actually listen when you're talking to them.

Put your phone down. Look at people when they're speaking. Ask questions like "How are you feeling about this?" or "What do you think we should try?" You'll be shocked how much people appreciate being heard.

My neighbor Sarah runs our community garden, and she's amazing at this. When someone has a problem with their plants, she doesn't immediately start giving advice. She asks what they've already tried and how they're feeling about it. People love working with her because she makes them feel important.

Keep Your Promises – All of Them

This one's huge. If you say you'll call someone back, call them back. If you promise to bring snacks to the meeting, bring the snacks. If you tell your kid you'll help with homework after dinner, help with homework after dinner.

People notice when you do what you say you'll do. They also notice when you don't. I learned this the hard way when I kept saying "I'll get back to you" and then forgetting. Now I write everything down or do it right away.

The small stuff matters just as much as the big stuff. Maybe even more.

Talk Like a Regular Person

Stop using fancy words when simple ones work better. If you need people to finish something by Friday, say "Can you get this done by Friday?" Don't say "I need this completed by the end of the business week."

I once had a boss who always said "Let's circle back and touch base offline." We never knew what he actually wanted us to do. Compare that to my current manager who says things like "Can we talk about this after lunch?" Much better.

When you're explaining something, pretend you're talking to your best friend or your teenager. Use words they'd understand.

Make Decisions and Move On

Here's something nobody tells you about leadership: you have to make decisions even when you don't have all the information. It's scary, but it's part of the job.

Get the facts you can get quickly, ask a few people what they think, then decide. Don't spend three weeks researching the perfect coffee machine for the office. Just pick one and move on.

Most decisions aren't permanent anyway. If it doesn't work out, you can change course later.

Help People Get Better at Stuff

Good leaders help others grow. This doesn't mean signing them up for expensive training courses. Sometimes it's as simple as saying "You're really good with people – want to try leading the next team meeting?"

Give people chances to try new things. Let them make mistakes without freaking out. Celebrate when they do well. My friend Mike manages a restaurant, and he's always letting servers try bartending or teaching new people how to work the register. His staff loves working there because they keep learning new skills.

Stay Cool When Things Go Wrong

When everything falls apart, people look at the leader to see how worried they should be. If you panic, everyone panics. If you stay calm and say "Okay, let's figure this out," people feel better.

This doesn't mean pretending everything's fine when it's not. It means being honest about problems while staying confident you can handle them. "Yeah, this is tough, but we've dealt with tough stuff before" goes a long way.

Show People How It's Done

Want your team to be on time? Show up on time yourself. Want them to be nice to customers? Be nice to customers when they're watching. Want them to clean up after themselves? Clean up after yourself.

People copy what they see way more than they follow what they hear. If you want to see certain behavior, start doing it yourself.

I noticed this with my kids. When I started putting my phone away during dinner, they started doing it too. When I started saying "please" and "thank you" more often, so did they.

Admit When You Mess Up

Nobody expects you to be perfect. But they do expect you to be honest when you make mistakes. "I messed up" are three of the most powerful words a leader can say.

When you admit mistakes quickly and figure out how to fix them, people trust you more, not less. It shows you're human and that it's okay for them to be human too.

It's Really About Caring

At the end of the day, good leadership comes down to actually caring about the people around you and the work you're doing together. People can tell when you genuinely care versus when you're just going through the motions.

You don't have to be the smartest person in the room or have years of experience. You just have to care enough to keep trying, keep learning from your mistakes, and keep looking for ways to help others succeed.

Start where you are, with what you have. Help your coworker with their project. Listen when your friend needs to vent. Step up when someone needs to organize the office pizza party.

Leadership happens in small moments every single day. The more you practice these small moments, the more natural it becomes. And before you know it, people will start coming to you when they need someone to lead.

Through my distinctive sticker club, life-changing courses, and an inspiring guided journal, I help people strengthen their self-awareness and cultivate richer, more authentic relationships.