I feel you. I am so sorry for what you have to go through. I get what you mean—like if it's a negative for me, it could mean even more of a headache because I know there is something there, but I don't know what it is. And when it's positive, it is also both a relief and further anxiety for me. It's a relief because my issue is finally valid and confirmed, but I'm also worrying about the next step.

Worse still is getting the wrong or conflicting results. It’s like you are trapped in a limbo.

Not everything can be proven or cured. As we grow older, we all know that most things are not as simple as a cold where you take some meds, sleep, and get well. Most of the time, we just live with it and we manage it.

I think these kinds of things only people like us can understand. If we ever talk to someone who is so blessed they never get sick, they would expect us to just pop a pill and be cured