Built to Last!
If only the cry of my voice could be heard, if only my mind could be seen and if only my tears could be visible enough!
I have thought of what I could do to be better, to heal and to stay put. What can I do to be the best version of the life I want, what can I do to make me proud and stay dedicated in my words and promises.
I keep going back on my words and it hurts, I repeating the same thing over time and it still hurts, I have wondered why it keep happening, why I see myself on that same thing I said no to. I have tried to push, to maintain my lane, to focus but still, in all of that, I return back to it.
If God my creator could help me get better because I know he helps those who call to him for help, he hears our secret tears and he is ever present. I want to look back to my life and see where I used to be, I want to live a fulfilled life in peace and joy without any contradiction, I want to always see me as I wish to be seen.
I want to be better, but don't know how is something that eats me up daily, something that gets me so worked up and restless. Can I ever get better? Can I ever witness my life the way I want it? Can it ever be possible with God to make me better? Or has God given up on me?
I wish to stay so quiet, out from the regular noise of this life, out from the troubles, the distractions, the mental stress, the chaos, and reflect, meditate, re-programme my life. This would help me heal, stay focused, dedicated, and find myself again. I am not who I want to be, although I am learning, I am building and I am becoming. It only takes a process for anything to be completed so I am ready to pass through the process.
I am ready to walk the way, pass through the process and see the end. I cannot fail, and I cannot fall, I just want to be better and I will for I am built to last!
This is Deep!
I pray for strength for you as you walk through the process to be built to last.
I may not know what this means but I can tell you that you are come out strong. You can do this, be strong, set boundaries, be disciplined, be strict and take the bull by the horn.
If you need to speak to someone you trust about what you are going through, that will be also good.
I think this will help you balance up!
I love you very much and am rooting for you.
You'd find your path again.
Keep pushing and making small consistent steps to reach your goals. It might feel overwhelming at first. It might feel like you are not making progress at all. But then, those tiny steps accumulate into something bigger. You grow stronger and sharper.
I wish you all the best.
And to anyone experiencing this, I'd encourage you to keep believing building that empire you desire. E go better.
Upvoted! Thank you for supporting witness @jswit.