Back Flip

You know when people say they have seen it all, well, unless they have been in health care, they really haven't seen anything. I graduated nursing school in 1987, back in the days when health care was fat and nurses had help. I knew I wanted to go into psychiatric nursing, that tells you what type of up bringing I had, feeling a sense of home in a locked psychiatric ward was, well, not everyone's cup of tea.

I started out as a 24 year old nurse at the Veteran's Administration in Menlo Park California. My unit was the original "One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest" and Jack Nicholson had nothing on these Vets. I remember my first weekend as Charge Nurse, I was confident, secure and a total control freak, still am. I had been in my positon for about 6 months, new all the patients names and some of their "behaviors", but nothing really prepared me for the crazy that was heading my way. I did my morning rounds, gave assignments out and settled in. My co worker Barbara, who was assigned medication nurse, said 'Mr. Holmes is starting up again", realizing he had not had his prn of Haldol, we new to clear the other patients from the dayroom. Mr. Holmes was a 6'4",210lb, 58 year old, bald African American man with a large frontal craniotomy scar going across his forehead. This is what they did to mentally ill patients who were uncontrollable and Electric Shock Therapy didn't work. What was left afterwards, was a frankinstieninan shell of person. Considering his lot in life, Mr. Holmes was a very, polite, gentle giant when medicated. I went up to him and said "Hi, Mr. Holmes, how ya doing today". He swung his arms up and did a back flip, yes, a full on back flip in the dayroom and stuck the landing like an Olympian, this was his "crazy". This was not the first time I had seem Mr. Holmes unmedicated, nor the first back flip. I realized , we were going to have to tie him down and put him into 4 point leather restraints, soon, because the backflips would continue and he didn't always land upright.

As other staff kept the dayroom secure, I push he silent red panic button on the wall, which alerted a show of force was needed. Available staff from all over the building were alerted that there was a "situation" occurring and a taken down might be needed.
All the while, I was talking and watching the backflips, four by now, no one was coming. My three other staff, two tiny Philippino medical assistants and my even tinier Cambodian medication nurse, stood their looking at their, medium sized, very white charge nurse. So, when no one came and Mr. Holmes went to the door and started pounding it. I had a couple of choices, I could let him out or I could let him turn around and pound us. I calming decided, he needed fresh air and opened the door. So there went Mr. Holmes, running down the sidewalk onto the lawn. Without thinking, I ran after him, screaming "Not on my weekend Mr. Holmes, not on my weekend" This is the day I realized that no one is psychotic 24 hours a day, even the sickest of the sick have bouts of insight and clarity. Mr. Holmes kept running, then suddenly he tripped on a missing patch of grass. Forgetting his, size, psychosis, agitation and backflips, I yelled "What are you doing, this is my first weekend being charge nurse, what were doing pounding on the door and acting crazy, get up NOW" Mr. Holmes, got up slowly with his head hung low and said softly "Sorry, Miss. Holly"

I took Mr. Holmes by the hand, by then two other staff had showed up form another unit. We walked past them hand in hand, back to our unit. Nothing else was said, nothing else was done, Mr. Holmes took his medication and a nap. I sat down at the break room table and realized I was shaking, what had I done, what had happened and then it all made sense. People are people, you either connect with them or you don't, but when you do, you realize we're not so crazy after all.