I appreciate your honest and open share. @simplymike

yes these beliefs we pick up in the early years can seem like they are set in cement, but it IS possible to clear them.

They would have served a good purpose back in your childhood but now in adulthood WE get to decide. we get to define happiness for ourselves.
then it's about bringing those younger parts of us (who can still very much be living in the past) up to date with the new memo! It's a process that requires patience, but it can be done.