A few things that come to my mind:

• You could switch to a different journal mode like 'WAL' as described in the official documentation (https://sqlite.org/wal.html), which allows that reading and writing can proceed concurrently.
• If that query really takes 20 minutes to finish, I guess there is something wrong with the columns/indices structure or it is related to a missing index for sorting/counting the rows.
• Do you return the rows all at once or are you using OFFSET and LIMIT?
• For such a large dataset I would highly recommend to use ids (integers) for the type (for example, 1 = 'mute', 2 = 'blog' etc.)

I'm pretty sure that this is not related to SQLite's performance :)
This might also help: https://www.sqlitetutorial.net/sqlite-having/