Whyy????

The people who matter to us whether they are our parents, siblings, or friends are all given a different level of access to our hearts. We tolerate their mistakes and the pain they cause because we do not want to lose them.
But for how long?
We cannot keep doing that forever. The pain someone repeatedly causes can slowly reduce the place they hold in our hearts. I think that with friends, we can often move on, forget things, and become close again, especially if the issue was not too serious. With siblings, we can say the worst things to each other and still return to normal because our hearts clear quickly.

But with parents, it feels different. We do not easily forget the things they say, even though they are the people who hold the greatest value in our lives. Before making decisions, we think of them first. We place them above everyone else. Maybe that is why even their smallest words affect us so deeply.
Or perhaps it is because this is a relationship we cannot simply ignore. We cannot pretend that we do not care, because we do care a lot. So much that, over time, after being hurt again and again, a certain comfort begins to disappear.
Without wanting to, we start creating distance between ourselves and them, afraid that their words might hurt us again. The love is still there, but we protect ourselves so that it does not slowly turn into something else. Maybe it is a defense mechanism. I do not know.
What I do know is that every person has their own importance in our lives, and their words affect us according to the place they hold in our hearts. The impact is real, but our reactions are never the same with everyone.
I think about this a lot. If there is one thing I have spent more time thinking about than anything else, it is this.
I do not know why it happens, but once that feeling of comfort is lost, becoming the same again is incredibly difficult. Sometimes, it feels almost impossible❤️‍🩹