A short story about a tree.steemCreated with Sketch.

in #writing6 years ago

I went into the forest to find a tree,

and behold, I found a tree.

Here is the tree I found:


the fucking tree.jpg


Location: Somewhere in the Pike National Forest just north of Divide, Colorado.

And here is a list of all the things that happened after I found this tree:

  1. I changed my mind about hanging myself from a tree in the Pike National Forest just north of Divide, Colorado
  2. I hiked back to my car and drove home
  3. I opened a beer and wrote this short story

The end.


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I homeschool my son and presently we are studying ancient Egypt in history. This afternoon I read to him from a book of myths, the first being about Ra, the sun god. Ra travels across the sky every day, and at night he circles back through the underworld. In the morning he was a baby, and by evening an old man. Ra stated, "'What a journey. What a thrill.' He had to repeat it forever." Ra certainly was an optimist, but I agree with him, for the most part.

I see tracks around that tree, but I suppose hiking is good for you :)

Hiking is good for me, and the woods and the wilderness are good for me. Trees to hang myself from become trees to write about, cliffs to jump from become vantage points for beautiful photography, etc. This is how it is for many people. Perhaps I shall meet Ra some evening and speak to him about his journey.

I think of people in terms of light and dark. Neither is bad or good, just different. We are on opposite ends.

Evening is a good time to meet him I think. He is all wise and stuff then, and less blinding.

Plus, I don't like getting up early.

Ahh.. it’s one of those. The kind where the article is advertising and the food stuff is in the comments. 👍🏿

Something like that.

Super glad you changed your mind on the hanging part! Glad to see you're still hanging in here, or back to hanging in here though, that's a hanging I can get behind!

Thanks @dreemit! :) I'll be hanging here for a while, unless of course I happen to find another tree that's better for hanging than Steemit is.

You should have hanged yourself, then the world wouldn't have to deal with your terrible writing. @brandt you suck

thanks @otherbrandt, it's always good to hear that other people are enjoying my work. I wasn't planning to write any more short stories but because of your comment I think I might try to produce a few more. What should I write about first, the cool rock I found while hiking today, or the rubber ducky I have that sings Bobby Darin's 1982 smash hit "Splish Splash" every time I squeeze its butt?

You idiot I didn't say anything about enjoying your work, can't you fucking read?? Your writing sucks and I wish you had killed yourself. I don't give a fuck what you write about it will all be equally bad. You're an idiot

Okay, so you think I should write about the cool rock I found first? And thanks again for complimenting me on my writing ability. People like you make me want to keep writing even though most of the time it feels like there's no point. So, thanks @otherbrandt!

No goddammit! Don't write about anything just go kill yourself already!! WTF is your problem!!!

Okay great, so here's the story about that cool rock I found while hiking today!

A Short Story About the Cool Rock I Found While Hiking Today


Would you believe that I found a rock while I was hiking in the mountains today? Believe it or not, it's the truth because I found a rock, and it was a cool one, true story. It's pretty rare to find a rock in the mountains much less a cool one like the one I found. But I found it, for real! I'd show you a picture of the rock I found but I wasn't able to take a picture before the rock jumped out of my hands and threw itself over the edge of a cliff. I felt bad that I hadn't thought to take a picture of the cool rock before it jumped off the cliff like that, but as they say, rocks will be rocks, and you really can't stop rocks from being rocks. Especially the cool ones. You can't really stop a cool rock from jumping off a cliff. I mean you can try, but if you do try, it will probably just make the rock want to jump off the cliff even more. And then where does that leave you, hiker of mountains and seeker of cool rocks? It leaves you standing there all alone in the wilderness, alone and tired and sad, and the only rock within miles with which to kill yourself by smashing it repeatedly into the side of your skull, has just thrown itself off a cliff. What to do? What to do?

The end.

Flagged for terrible writing

Thanks for the support!