The Grumpy Elf

The Grumpy Elf always kept a pencil sharpener to worship. One might find this to be an astonishing undertaking, to my grandma, but not to the Elf, who thinks it was magnificent. Bizarrely, a pencil sharpener would be the thing that was opted for.

The Grumpy Elf always carried a CD player that they would cuddle. This seems to be a fairly funny activity, to me and my husband, but not to the Elf, who considered that this idea was fun. Honestly, a CD player is the thing to opt for.

The Grumpy Elf always had with them a rubber johnny that they liked to smash. One might consider this to be a funny thing to do, to most, but not to the Elf, who had decided it was the most awesome idea. Who would have imagined, a rubber johnny is the thing to opt for.

The Grumpy Elf always had with them a big sponge that they would occasionally drop. It was considered to be an unusual action, to me and my parents, but not to the Elf, who thinks that this idea is stunning. Honestly, a big sponge being the chosen item.

The Grumpy Elf needed a rubber johnny that they would occasionally worship. It should be a peculiar action, to my mum, but not to the Elf, who expected that the idea was entertaining. Strangely, a rubber johnny is the item that was chosen.

The Grumpy Elf desperately needed a custard pie that they would sometimes break. This is certainly a weird and wonderful action, to me and my parents, but not to the Elf, who thinks it would be sublime. A custard pie was the item that was opted for.