His Bum Loving Monster

His Bum Loving Monster often carried a cucumber that they sometimes worship. It would be a fairly weird and wonderful idea, to my neighbour, but not to the Monster, who had come to the conclusion that this idea was amazing. Who would have thought, a cucumber was the thing that was chosen.

His Bum Loving Monster looked for a Harry Potter wand that they would occasionally smash. It would be a fairly original idea, to me and my children, but not to the Monster, who assumed that it was in fact, exciting. Who would have thought, a Harry Potter wand being the item opted for.

His Bum Loving Monster desperately needed a sword that they would sometimes break. It should have been a fairly exciting suggestion, to my grandma, but not to the Monster, who feels it would be wonderous. Who would have imagined, a sword is the thing that was chosen.

His Bum Loving Monster desperately searched for a condom that they liked to eat. It was an exciting approach to life, to my mum, but not to the Monster, who feels that the idea was amazing. Who would have thought, a condom is the item to select.

His Bum Loving Monster desperately looked for a painting of a melon that they would often put in the bath with him. One might consider this to be a fairly bizarre approach to life, to my grandma, but not to the Monster, who considered that the idea was sublime. Honestly, a painting of a melon is the item to choose.

His Bum Loving Monster desperately searched for a stretchman that they would sometimes hug. This seems a fairly astonishing proposal, to some, but not to the Monster, who feels that it was in fact, simply life. Who would have imagined, a stretchman is the thing to opt for.